"Breaking Ties" by Norman Rockwell‘This Collar, Blue’ and Other Poetry by Zachary Dilks The Society March 29, 2018 Beauty, Culture, Poetry 27 Comments This Collar, Blue My elbows leak with grease And all my toes are laid with steel I’m rough of neck My knuckles specked with cuts that never heal The world I mend The swirls on plastic lens paints squalor’s view Ah, but still, I’d never trade this collar, blue In Bloom A terzanelle How sweet the summer sun defeats the gloom How numb the winter made these fragile bones How sweet the summer sun can seem in bloom “Come sleep beneath the skies that beckon home” The ocean surf is calling at my name How numb the winter made these fragile bones This heart, where once roamed free, was bound in chains Though, never for a moment did it yield The ocean surf is calling at my name The blinding nothing blanketed the fields My breath was writing heartache in the sky Though, never for a moment did it yield This voice did bray and mourn for which it vies My soul was held aloft in every song My breath was writing heartache in the sky The sun spoke “come and rest where you belong” How sweet the summer sun defeats the gloom My soul was held aloft in every song How sweet the summer sun can seem in bloom Zachary Dilks is a writer currently residing just outside of Austin, Texas. A toolmaker by trade and a poet by heart, he began pursuing his passion for writing at age 17. NOTE: The Society considers this page, where your poetry resides, to be your residence as well, where you may invite family, friends, and others to visit. Feel free to treat this page as your home and remove anyone here who disrespects you. Simply send an email to email@example.com. Put “Remove Comment” in the subject line and list which comments you would like removed. The Society does not endorse any views expressed in individual poems or comments and reserves the right to remove any comments to maintain the decorum of this website and the integrity of the Society. Please see our Comments Policy here. Share this:Click to share on Twitter (Opens in new window)Click to share on Facebook (Opens in new window)Click to print (Opens in new window)Click to share on LinkedIn (Opens in new window)Click to share on WhatsApp (Opens in new window)Click to email this to a friend (Opens in new window)Click to share on Pinterest (Opens in new window) 27 Responses E. V. "Beth" Wyler March 29, 2018 Sometimes blue collar workers aren’t given proper credit. Everyone who works hard to earn an honest livelihood should be respected. Also, many blue collar workers are highly skilled and perform invaluable services. They also earn more than many college grads with liberal arts degrees. I particularly enjoyed the last sentence. Regarding your 2nd poem, I find Villanelles to be quite challenging; however, I did enjoy your imagery. Keep on writing! E. V. Reply C.B. Anderson March 29, 2018 Beth, I don’t understand why you find villanelles so challenging. The first principle is to find two rhyme-endings that have many solutions in the English language. The same problem occurs when trying to write a Petrarchan sonnet, but in both cases the difficulty is rather easily solved. See: http://www.versewisconsin.org/Issue105/poems105/anderson.html and scroll down to “Featherweight” here:: http://www.strongverse.org/cgi-bin/poiesis.pl?search=Anderson_C_B&header=poet&category=poem&method=perfect&order_by=number&order=cba&template=poem Reply E. V. "Beth" Wyler March 30, 2018 Oh, yes, I do find Villanelles somewhat challenging to write. However, that’s not inherently bad; challenges frequently give rise to our best work. Finding appropriate rhymes is actually the easiest part of Villanelle composition. The challenge involves abiding by its rhyming pattern while simultaneously satisfying ALL the Villanelle’s other requirements (i.e., deciding upon your recurring lines, mapping your message stanza by stanza, and weaving your words so that the recurring lines grammatically “fit” into their allotted places; all while working with rhyme and meter and, of course, communicating your message in a poetic voice). I enjoy writing Villanelles, but refrain from trying to do so when I fatigued. Zachary Dilks March 29, 2018 E.V. I’m glad you liked the poems. I’ve always felt a certain sense of tranquility when I’m making something and working with my hands. It’s a great life to live. I think any poem where you have repeating lines that need to all flow together and blend well is definitely a challenge. Thank you, and I hope you’ll enjoy more of my poems in the future. Zachary Dilks Reply E. V. "Beth" Wyler March 30, 2018 Yes! I’ll keep an eye out for them. Keep writing! E. V. David Paul Behrens March 29, 2018 Nice poems, Zachary. Here is one I wrote many years ago when I worked in a factory. It could be lyrics for a song. Any songwriters out there? GRAVEYARD BLUES Quarter past five and the sky”s getting light That old yellow sun will soon be in sight I’ m driving home, I’ve been up all night With these overtime, graveyard blues Everywhere I look, there’s nobody around Folks are just waking up, all over town So they can go to work ’til the sun goes down While I’ve got these old graveyard blues After work I relax, as a general rule Sit on my porch, watch the kids go to school Drinking beer in the morning, I look like a fool And I’ve got these old graveyard blues My family’s waking up, I am ready for bed When I should be awake, I’m asleep instead Sometimes I feel I must be out of my head And I get these old graveyard blues Someday I’ll get a job, before my working days are done When I won’t have to sleep beneath the heat of the sun Spend every night with my wife, have a whole lot of fun And forget about these graveyard blues Reply Zachary Dilks March 29, 2018 David Thank you I’m glad you liked the poems! That’s a nice one. There’s something magical about being awake when all the world is seemingly asleep, isn’t there? Zachary Dilks Reply E. V. "Beth" Wyler March 30, 2018 It does sound like it could be a country song. Good luck with it. E. V. Reply David Paul Behrens March 30, 2018 Thank you, Zachary and Beth. Sally Cook March 29, 2018 Dear Mr. Dilks – Yours is sensitive and beautiful work, backed up by experience. Keep on, and please share more. Sally Cook Reply Zachary Dilks March 29, 2018 Sally Thank you, that means the world to me! I’ll keep writing and I hope you’ll keep enjoying! Zachary Dilks Reply C.B. Anderson March 29, 2018 “In Bloom” is definitely not a villanelle. It looks to be a terzanelle, a hybrid between a villanelle and terza rima. Reply The Society March 29, 2018 Great catch, C.B.! Mr. Dilks originally labeled this a terzanelle and I seem to have written the wrong form on here. Now fixed. Thank you. -Evan Reply E. V. "Beth" Wyler March 30, 2018 C. B., Evan: How about some tutorials on these forms? I’m probably not the only one who’d enjoy them. E. V. The Society March 30, 2018 Hi E.V., here is a tutorial: http://classicalpoets.org/how-to-write-a-terza-rima-with-examples/ I hope it helps! Zachary Dilks March 29, 2018 C.B. You’re absolutely right, it is a terzanelle. You have a good eye for poetic forms. What’s your favorite form to write in? The Quatern is a personal preference of mine. Zachary Dilks Reply C.B. Anderson March 30, 2018 Zachery, I write a lot of quatrains, sonnets, and more complicated stanzaic forms. I came to villanelles rather late, and if you go to the link above to Verse Wisconsin, and then read the sidebar on the right you will see why (the sound here is totally garbled, so don’t dwell on that). I find that the quatrain comes most naturally to me, and I almost always rhyme all the lines (abab, sometimes abba, and only occasionally aabb). But I love it when I can put together more complicated stanzaic forms, such as rhyme royale, abcabc, abacbc & others, often heterometrically. Some examples can be found here: https://thegalwayreview.com/?s=C.B.+Anderson and here: http://www.strongverse.org/cgi-bin/poiesis.pl?search=Anderson_C_B&header=poet&category=poem&method=perfect&order_by=number&order=cba&template=poem If I haven’t answered all your questions, or if you have more, then please post a reply. ben grinberg March 30, 2018 rendered in song: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=d8wk7F5T3rM Reply Zachary Dilks March 30, 2018 Ben That’s so cool on so many levels! I think it’s neat how differently people can interpret art. Thank you for singing my words! Zachary Dilks Reply C.B. Anderson March 30, 2018 Zachary, I’m sorry to have misspelled your first name in my previous comment. Reply Zachary Dilks April 1, 2018 C.B. No worries. Better to have misspelled my first name than to have mispronounced my last name like all of my school teachers. Zachary Dilks Reply C.B. Anderson April 1, 2018 Noted. But is there more than one way to pronounce it? Zachary Dilks April 2, 2018 C.B. They used to leave out the L and pronounce it Dicks C.B. Anderson April 2, 2018 Ouch, and OK. But if you are are a reader of science fiction, it’s not such a bad thing to be associated with Philip K. Dick or Gordon Dickson. Also note that the letter “L” is normally unpronounced in such English words as “palm,” “Holmes.” & “could.” Respectively, these these words are pronounced “pom,” “homes,” & “kood.” Though these details of Anglic phonetics might seem a bit over-wrought at times, they come in handy when one is searching for an end rhyme. Reply Zachary Dilks April 7, 2018 C.B As an adult who understands the English language is kind of a screwy one, the mispronunciation doesn’t bother me. As a school kid, not so much. Reply Robert Piazza April 5, 2018 I really like “This Collar, Blue.” It paints a picture & evokes a feeling, especially the last line!! Reply Zachary Dilks April 7, 2018 Robert Thank you for saying that! I’m glad you enjoyed it. The last line is my favorite too. Doesn’t matter how hard and sometimes thankless the work is. There is a feeling of purpose when you do a job well. Reply Leave a Reply to Zachary Dilks Cancel ReplyYour email address will not be published.CommentName* Email* Website Notify me of follow-up comments by email. Notify me of new posts by email. This site uses Akismet to reduce spam. Learn how your comment data is processed.