"Sitting up with a Sick Friend" by Cassius Marcellus Coolidge‘Iambic Barktameter’ by Mark F. Stone The Society January 21, 2023 Culture, Humor, Poetry 31 Comments . A Note on Iambic Barktameter I have an Australian Shepard named Sunny who loves poetry. I didn’t believe it at first, but she proved it to me. She showed me her copy of Poetry magazine and said, “Look how dog-eared it is.” Then she told me that her favorite poets are Percy Biscuit Shelley and Ezra Hound. And she listed her favorite poems. There’s one by Christopher Marlowe called “The Passionate Australian Shepherd to His Love.” Another is by John Keats. It’s called “When I Have Fears That I May Cease to Bark.” And then there’s the classic poem by Allen Ginsberg. You know the one. And Sunny’s favorite poem of all time is by Emily Dickinson. The title is “Dinner is the thing with feathers.” Now I will read a poem that Sunny wrote. It’s called “Iambic Barktameter.” . Iambic Barktameter I’m trained in poetics. I’m schooled in aesthetics. I’m savvy with tropes and with verses. And what could be sweeter than a dog who knows meter and one who, each morning, rehearses! Iambics are a breeze. It’s hard to miss the mark. Bark. BARK. Bark. BARK. Bark. BARK. Bark. BARK. Bark. BARK. Bark. BARK. Dactyls are easy. A walk in the park. BARK. Bark. Bark. BARK. Bark. Bark. BARK. Bark. Bark. BARK. A succession of anapests gives me a spark. Bark. Bark. BARK. Bark. Bark. BARK. Bark. Bark. BARK. Bark. Bark. BARK. See my trochees gleam and sparkle. Barkle. Barkle. Barkle. Barkle. And a foot I think of fondly has two stresses. It’s the spondee. BARK. BARK. I know my poems will take flight. Success, I sense, is near. I’m ready to embark upon a stunning, new career. My poems are not doggerel. I’m more than just a rhymester. They won’t be selling only at the corner five-and-dime store. My poetry will make things happen. It will surely sell. My narratives must be unleashed. I have a tale to tell. . . Mark F. Stone grew up near Seattle. After graduating from Brandeis University and Stanford Law School, he worked as an attorney for the United States Air Force for 33 years. He is a retired Lieutenant Colonel. He began writing poems in 2005, as a way to woo his bride-to-be into wedlock. His poems have been published by the Society of Classical Poets, Light, and the Ohio Poetry Association. Some of his poems and photographs can be found at: markfstone.substack.com. He lives in Ohio. NOTE TO READERS: If you enjoyed this poem or other content, please consider making a donation to the Society of Classical Poets. The Society of Classical Poets does not endorse any views expressed in individual poems or commentary. Trending now: 31 Responses Roy Eugene Peterson January 21, 2023 That is a wonderful poem with my sense of humor incorporated. Using “doggerel” and “tale” that when spoken is also “tail,” as a double entendre is inspired. I really enjoyed your poem. Reply Mark F. Stone January 22, 2023 Roy, I’m glad you enjoyed it. Thank you. Mark Reply Allegra Silberstein January 21, 2023 Your Australian Shepherd is a miracal…so is your delightful poem. Thank you…Allegra Reply Mark F. Stone January 22, 2023 Allegra, Thank you for your kind words. Mark Reply C.B Anderson January 21, 2023 I think the funniest phrase in this funniest of poems is “embark upon.” The best rhyme: rhymster/dime store. I’ll bet most dogs can, in some sense, learn to count syllables. Reply Mark F. Stone January 22, 2023 C.B., I am pleased that you enjoyed the humor. Thank you for commenting. Mark Reply Julian D. Woodruff January 22, 2023 I loved that one, too. I also really miss five-and-dime stores. Reply Mark F. Stone January 22, 2023 Julian, I’m glad you enjoyed that rhyme. Thank you for dropping by. Mark Paul Buchheit January 21, 2023 Very creative, Mark! Enjoyable reading. Reply Mark F. Stone January 22, 2023 Paul, I’m glad you enjoyed it. Thank you for weighing in. Mark Reply Norma Pain January 21, 2023 This poem is a ‘howl’. Thank you Mark for a fun read. Reply Mark F. Stone January 22, 2023 Norma, You’re very welcome. Thank you. Mark Reply Cynthia Erlandson January 21, 2023 I laughed out loud all the way through! Thanks for the great entertainment, Mark. I’m so glad poets at SCP have a sense of humor! Reply Mark F. Stone January 22, 2023 Cynthia, Me, too! I’m glad it entertained you. Mark Reply Tonia Smith-Kalouria January 21, 2023 Dear fellow Buckeye, Mark, What good fun! I am dog-tired from laughing. (And just what we all need nowadays.) Reply Mark F. Stone January 22, 2023 Tonia, As we say here in Ohio: O-H-I-O! I am pleased that the poem made you laugh. Mark Reply Paul Freeman January 21, 2023 A Haiku, perhaps, Mark. Bark, bark, bark, bark, bark, bark, bark, bark, bark, bark, bark, bark, bark, bark, bark, bark, bark. Thanks for the read. Reply Mark F. Stone January 22, 2023 Paul, You’re welcome. And I like your haiku idea! Mark Reply jd January 21, 2023 Enjoyed, Mark. The introduction rivals the poem. And your website is full of information for those still in pursuit of fame (sort of). Thank you. Nice photographs too. Reply Mark F. Stone January 22, 2023 JD, I’m glad you enjoyed the introduction. It was a lot of fun to put together. And I’ll be adding more poems, photos, and poetry resources to the website. Thank you for commenting. Mark Reply Yael January 21, 2023 Doggone, this is a hoot of a howling good poem, thank you. Really enjoyed it. Now I’m going to read it out loud to my farm dog, for his refinement and continuing education. Reply Mark F. Stone January 22, 2023 Yael, I am pleased that my Australian Shepherd can help educate your hard-working farm dog! Thank you for commenting. Mark Reply James Sale January 22, 2023 Quite, quite brilliant work – very funny indeed, and it almost ought to be compulsory teaching in secondary schools: so many poetical activities could derive from this, ending perhaps with the challenge to write the Catameter or – choose your favourite title – any noisy animals’ sound effect! Well done Mark – your work goes from strength to strength. So proud of performing with you in Bryant Park in 2019 – that truly was a hoot! Reply Mark F. Stone January 22, 2023 James, I am flattered by and appreciative of your praise. Using the poem as a springboard for other poetic activities is a wonderful idea. I greatly enjoyed reading poems with you in the public park in New York City in 2019. And I very much look forward to the next time we can work together. Mark Reply Cheryl Corey January 22, 2023 Great imagination. Reply Mark F. Stone January 22, 2023 Cheryl, Thank you very much! Mark Reply Geoffrey S. January 23, 2023 The middle barking part is especially good. The meter curiously corresponds to the wants of many a barking dog. Those that I’ve known anyway. Reply Mark F. Stone January 23, 2023 Geoffrey, Sunny’s barking is very rhythmic… especially when the mailman drives by! Thank you for commenting on the poem. Mark Reply Susan Jarvis Bryant January 23, 2023 Mark, I am blown away by Sunny’s penchant for poetry and meter… what a literary pet you have! Not only is this unique poem highly entertaining, it’s also educational… whenever my meter breaks free from its leash, I shall haul myself over here for some Iambic Barktameter training… essential for top dogs! Mark – you have a furry genius on your hands. I love this poem. Thank you for making this poet’s endeavors easier! Reply Mark F. Stone January 24, 2023 Susan, Sunny is extremely proud that she can be of assistance to you. She asked me to tell you she gives your poetry five barks out of five! Mark Reply Jody Behrens January 24, 2025 Mark, what a lovely and poetic surprise to know you have such a connection to pups after all these years. Isn’t life such a joyful puzzle? Jody Reply Leave a Reply Cancel ReplyYour email address will not be published.CommentName* Email* Website Δ This site uses Akismet to reduce spam. Learn how your comment data is processed.
Roy Eugene Peterson January 21, 2023 That is a wonderful poem with my sense of humor incorporated. Using “doggerel” and “tale” that when spoken is also “tail,” as a double entendre is inspired. I really enjoyed your poem. Reply
Allegra Silberstein January 21, 2023 Your Australian Shepherd is a miracal…so is your delightful poem. Thank you…Allegra Reply
C.B Anderson January 21, 2023 I think the funniest phrase in this funniest of poems is “embark upon.” The best rhyme: rhymster/dime store. I’ll bet most dogs can, in some sense, learn to count syllables. Reply
Mark F. Stone January 22, 2023 C.B., I am pleased that you enjoyed the humor. Thank you for commenting. Mark Reply
Julian D. Woodruff January 22, 2023 I loved that one, too. I also really miss five-and-dime stores. Reply
Mark F. Stone January 22, 2023 Julian, I’m glad you enjoyed that rhyme. Thank you for dropping by. Mark
Cynthia Erlandson January 21, 2023 I laughed out loud all the way through! Thanks for the great entertainment, Mark. I’m so glad poets at SCP have a sense of humor! Reply
Tonia Smith-Kalouria January 21, 2023 Dear fellow Buckeye, Mark, What good fun! I am dog-tired from laughing. (And just what we all need nowadays.) Reply
Mark F. Stone January 22, 2023 Tonia, As we say here in Ohio: O-H-I-O! I am pleased that the poem made you laugh. Mark Reply
Paul Freeman January 21, 2023 A Haiku, perhaps, Mark. Bark, bark, bark, bark, bark, bark, bark, bark, bark, bark, bark, bark, bark, bark, bark, bark, bark. Thanks for the read. Reply
jd January 21, 2023 Enjoyed, Mark. The introduction rivals the poem. And your website is full of information for those still in pursuit of fame (sort of). Thank you. Nice photographs too. Reply
Mark F. Stone January 22, 2023 JD, I’m glad you enjoyed the introduction. It was a lot of fun to put together. And I’ll be adding more poems, photos, and poetry resources to the website. Thank you for commenting. Mark Reply
Yael January 21, 2023 Doggone, this is a hoot of a howling good poem, thank you. Really enjoyed it. Now I’m going to read it out loud to my farm dog, for his refinement and continuing education. Reply
Mark F. Stone January 22, 2023 Yael, I am pleased that my Australian Shepherd can help educate your hard-working farm dog! Thank you for commenting. Mark Reply
James Sale January 22, 2023 Quite, quite brilliant work – very funny indeed, and it almost ought to be compulsory teaching in secondary schools: so many poetical activities could derive from this, ending perhaps with the challenge to write the Catameter or – choose your favourite title – any noisy animals’ sound effect! Well done Mark – your work goes from strength to strength. So proud of performing with you in Bryant Park in 2019 – that truly was a hoot! Reply
Mark F. Stone January 22, 2023 James, I am flattered by and appreciative of your praise. Using the poem as a springboard for other poetic activities is a wonderful idea. I greatly enjoyed reading poems with you in the public park in New York City in 2019. And I very much look forward to the next time we can work together. Mark Reply
Geoffrey S. January 23, 2023 The middle barking part is especially good. The meter curiously corresponds to the wants of many a barking dog. Those that I’ve known anyway. Reply
Mark F. Stone January 23, 2023 Geoffrey, Sunny’s barking is very rhythmic… especially when the mailman drives by! Thank you for commenting on the poem. Mark Reply
Susan Jarvis Bryant January 23, 2023 Mark, I am blown away by Sunny’s penchant for poetry and meter… what a literary pet you have! Not only is this unique poem highly entertaining, it’s also educational… whenever my meter breaks free from its leash, I shall haul myself over here for some Iambic Barktameter training… essential for top dogs! Mark – you have a furry genius on your hands. I love this poem. Thank you for making this poet’s endeavors easier! Reply
Mark F. Stone January 24, 2023 Susan, Sunny is extremely proud that she can be of assistance to you. She asked me to tell you she gives your poetry five barks out of five! Mark Reply
Jody Behrens January 24, 2025 Mark, what a lovely and poetic surprise to know you have such a connection to pups after all these years. Isn’t life such a joyful puzzle? Jody Reply
