Humor

Golden Gloves My father fought in Golden Gloves. Back then The ring was where you slugged your way to hopes. It was no place for fey, aesthetic men— There’s no nuance on canvas, or the ropes. I...

  How Monkeys Came to Be adapted from a Palestinian folktale Monkeys and people once were one. For monkeys had from Adam come. As Adam's sons in every way, Those monkeys looked like us today. Yet...

  The Gardener at War Throughout our lives we hustle and we slave __To turn our gardens into magic places __Where beauty at its pinnacle erases Our darkest intimations of the grave; But what mundane...

  With Sorrow Do I Leave It is with sadness that I write to tell you that I am resigning from The New York Times. ---Bari Weiss, opinion writer, 13 July 2020 With sorrow do I leave The New York...

  Lockdown Leisure with apologies to W.H. Davies In lockdown life, should I but dare To take more time to stand and stare?--- More time to stand six feet away And gaze upon our world...

Your Smart Device a rondeau Your smart device was strange and new; It learned your voice and habits too; It played the songs you liked to hear; It answered your requests with cheer, And spat out facts...

  Editor’s Note: This poem was originally found in The Pebbles and Shells: A Book of Verses ,1909, edited by Donald Fraser. Another version was published in The Good Humor Book, by Robert Rango,...

  Good François Villon, petty thief, Carouser, cutpurse, scholar, sot; Young chronicler of gallows-grief, Escapee from the hempen knot; Depicter of the dregs and lees Of drunken students,...

A Case of Ghosts (Full Fathom Five parodied) In cradling case my fiddle lies, Waiting for the owner’s hand. Strings all slack, its music dies. Yet a not-quite-silent band There conspires to haunt my...

  Summer in Texas She sashays in on scorching licks of flame that singe the sticky fringes of the day. Her blaze, no brazen breeze can ease or tame; she sizzles as she splashes rays our way. Her...

The American Revolution: An Epic Poem Chapter I by Andrew Benson Brown   Chapter II: Thomas Jefferson in Hell On July Fourth of Eighteen Twenty-Six, Old Thomas Jefferson was sent to Hell In his...

  Summer Concerts The katydids and stridulant cicadas Regale us with their aestival sonatas. At night, surrounded by the song of crickets, We listen just as though we'd paid for tickets. first...

Viral Hair Care After four months untrimmed, my coiffure was ovoid, Well in tune with Aquarian couture. I was starting to look just like Christopher Lloyd In the old movie, “Back to the Future.” With...

  1. Poetry or prose? No one knows. 2. Shan’t waffle, 'tis awful. 3. Shan’t coddle, 'tis twaddle. 4. I can't say it faster: it's an utter disaster. 5. By smidgen or...

  I’ll Have My Say… by Susan Jarvis Bryant Don’t spit your ire upon my name. Don’t tell me that my view’s insane--- to sink down on one knee in shame. I won’t claim blame. I won’t...

  Samson’s Revenge a translation of Judges 15:16 With but an ass’s jawbone Asses I have made of them, The myriads, the masses. I have slaughtered heaps of men: Killed them, I alone, And with a...

  The Boncompagni Dragon The Boncompagni Dragon, by Bartolomeo Passerotti (1529-92). Pen with brown ink, over black chalk. Tobey Collection of Renaissance Drawings, Metropolitan Museum of Art A...

  Johann Sebastian Bach Truly loved music, yet Managed to wed twice And father a gang. The kids took their tonics, Eschewed bad harmonics, Bach said Bohemian Life could go hang! Frederick...

Two Tattoos   Tattoo One: On the Corporate and Politic Bodies Across my town, the shops and offices are short. Its buildings don’t blot out the sun. There’s sky to spare. However, needling,...

  On Antifa, Coming to the Country A well-regulated militia, being necessary to the security of a free state, the right of the people to keep and bear arms, shall not be infringed. ---Amendment II by...

  Destined for the Mount Rushmore of Radio Triumphal times are on the way, America’s Anchor Man. We Dittoheads will toast the day when all is Right again. You cover what they won’t...

  Georges Danton's Ghost Counsels the Protestors “Yes, America is burning. But that’s how forests grow.” –Maura Healey, Massachusetts Attorney General (June 2, 2020) Georges Danton’s ghost...

If I Owned a Macy's by Nancy Weber If I owned a Macy’s or other such stores… I'd tear down the plywood and unlock the doors. It used to be mine, but things change. Now it’s yours--- Men’s...

May 4, 2020 Response is Draconian, As if Napoleon’s Back on the emperor’s throne. Except now with “wanna-bes” Ruining economies, Governing states like his clone. With millions devoid of...

I recently discarded some unnecessary texts, and among them were two past editions (the 17th and the 20th) of Len Fulton’s Directory of Poetry Publishers. This venerable publication, from Dustbooks in...

  Dear Editor, My odes are grandiose and overblown With pudgy gluts of stodgy adjectives In floods of flabby babble prone to drone, All topped with tired, archaic additives. Forsooth, methinks the...

  Domain of Pain A piercing migraine or a throbbing toothache, A splinter underneath a fingernail, An upset stomach caused by too much fruitcake, And waiting for responses in the mail Are typical...

  Mastering Magic Set the questing mind on fire with magic, Learn the ancient lore then follow through. Effortlessness must be automatic, Forcing sorcery will never do. Wizardry well done is...

  My Last Duchess The Duke of Ferrara recalls his last wife. by Robert Browning That's my last Duchess painted on the wall, Looking as if she were alive. I call That piece a wonder, now: Fra...

  I. The rats infesting Kathmandu Airport Appear to co-exist in peace with man And have, it seems, since local time began, Been treated each like some great Juggernaut. Their teeming numbers...

  Piracy is now endemic to the Somali coast, since the West will do nothing to stop it. —News item, 2008 I have heard the mermaids singing, each to each. —T.S. Eliot Mermaids, sing me pirate...

Better Stock Than You after Henry Lawson’s "Prouder Man Than You" by Beverly Stock Your tome of pride be shattered, I’m from better Stock than you. You don’t treat all as equals, And I think...

The Argument: The Poet, having escaped the HellWard of European and corrupt politicians, emerges into the penultimate HellWard depth where he, with his guide, Dante, meets the Poetasters from America and...

  Tennyson thought it better “to have loved and lost, than…” Well, you know the rest. Of course this begs the question most of us can only guess. Is losing ever really good, or is this just...

Deep Regrets Dedicated to the memory of the 118 men of the Russian submarine Kursk, which exploded and sank in the Barents Sea on August 12th 2000. The protocols of men of power; Agendas passed in...

  Vermont in April doesn’t seem to know quite how to dress. She thinks she ought to wear bright, flowery things, and yet, she cannot tear herself away from all the clothes that go with winter....

"Winner: Humanitarian Award" Mugabe’s universally adored. He made his people multi-millionaires--- Zim dollars are the answer to their prayers. Champion of the poor, the sick, the old; A veritable...

  The Back-to-Work Protesters Limerick by Mark F. Stone Our minders with power and pensions can rob our hopes, while the Fourth Estate calls us a "mob." They would be less scornful and also more...

  For England & St. George In praise let’s raise our flagons to the conqueror of dragons to the Saint who fought for all he thought was fair. Let’s fly our flags and bellow for that bold,...

  Golf My friends love golf so much But I do not share the allure. There’re many other ways for me To function like manure.     It’s Love Last night we watched old videos Our...