"Sea Dream" by Robert Florczak‘The Great War’ and Other Poetry by Janice Thompson The Society December 26, 2018 Beauty, Culture, Poetry 5 Comments The Great War The world abruptly shattered Colossal was the war And of it’s better victims The gentler arts of yore. Such shards of glass, well scattered, Across the global floor As rhyming verse in meter To coalesce no more. Yet now and then a fragment May briefly glint and soar To heights today forbidden Of beauty at its core. Alas, its climb soon falters As modern currents roar Until it is extinguished By the winners of that war. Some Dance on Shallow Waves Deep woods surround an ebon lake Where moonlight casts their silhouette Embracing flecks of echoed stars, That dance on shallow waves. A fair, light breeze breaths now and then And liberates a leaf or two They float upon the water’s skin Tattoo-like they behave. A stone tossed by an impish hand Casts rings of ever wider girth In undulating blurry curves That seek to disarrange But soon the turbid rhythmic din Becalmed relaxes, melts, dissolves Into that shadow ring embrace. The dance begins again. So play the minutes, hours and days For those indifferent to the depths Content to ride the elements And dance on shallow waves. Janice Thompson has been writing poetry for more than fifty years. She composes tightly woven, unforced, metered verse. The influence of the British Lake District poets on her work is apparent in her contemporized writing style. Samples of her work have been posted to her blog at: https://janice-t.weebly.com Views expressed by individual poets and writers on this website and by commenters do not represent the views of the entire Society. The comments section on regular posts is meant to be a place for civil and fruitful discussion. Pseudonyms are discouraged. The individual poet or writer featured in a post has the ability to remove any or all comments by emailing submissions@ classicalpoets.org with the details and under the subject title “Remove Comment.” Share this:Click to share on Twitter (Opens in new window)Click to share on Facebook (Opens in new window) 5 Responses James A. Tweedie December 26, 2018 It never fails to amaze me how ordinary words placed in a certain order transcend language, conjure memory, induce tangible tactile feeling of place and presence, and become the music of their own accompaniment. Dear Janice, your second poem accomplished all this and more. Thank you for serenading me awake so gently, peacefully, thoughtfully into Boxing Day. I hope your Christmas was as beautiful, serene, and lovely as your poem. Reply benjamen grinberg December 26, 2018 Thank you for sharing this. I have to say, I am grateful. Reply Mark Stone December 26, 2018 Janice, Hello. 1. I think the first poem is well written. I have two thoughts. The first is that “it’s” should be “its.” Second, I get stuck on the phrase “better victims.” I just did an internet search on WWI, and it says that the total number of civilian and military casualties is estimated at about 37 million. This includes two of my ancestors on my mother’s side. I visited their graves in France many years ago. So saying that some victims are better than other victims, and that “rhyming verse in meter” is one of the “better victims” doesn’t really work for me. 2. When I read the second poem, I immediately thought to myself: this is the type of fresh, colorful and vivid language that poets like. The first and third stanzas are particularly strong, in my opinion. I have two specific comments. The first is that “breeze breathes” is kind of a tongue twister and those two words together slow my reading of that line just a bit. The second is that if you changed “They” to “That” in line 7, I think that stanza would flow a little more smoothly. Reply James A. Tweedie December 26, 2018 Mark, unless I misread the first poem, the “Great War” being described is that between classical poetry and its modernist nemesis, free verse. Please, someone correct me if I am wrong in this. Reply Gregory Spicer December 26, 2018 Initially, my mind raced to make WW1 associations due to the title just as Mr. Stone’s did, but then I saw your post and felt that you had the interpretation in the bag since the poem certainly works very adroitly when read in that light. A marvelous poem indeed! Leave a Reply Cancel Reply Your email address will not be published.CommentName* Email* Website Notify me of follow-up comments by email. Notify me of new posts by email. This site uses Akismet to reduce spam. Learn how your comment data is processed.