My husband posed his need to leave; a family vote was cast.
The outcome brought me to my knees and left my heart aghast.
Now, I’m a tad controlling – of that I will admit;
“LEAVE” just means we’ll seal a DEAL for an amicable split.

It pains my soul to tell you that my family is thick.
The brightest one’s a bigot and a hod short of a brick.
Their meagre education and imbecilic views
have left them prey to hubby’s illusion-infused ruse.

Another vote is what I need to set the blockheads straight.
When they hear my side, they will decide on terms that I dictate.
Meanwhile, my fees for leaving will escalate and soar,
with bureaucracy so blinding he’ll steer clear of the door.

I’ll spurn the date he’s earmarked to start a life that’s free
and scorn and snub and spurn again until he stays with me.
I intend to be insufferable – a shrew who digs complaining
until my spouse drops his grouse in the interest of REMAINing!




Susan Jarvis Bryant is a church secretary and poet whose homeland is Kent, England.  She is now an American citizen living on the coastal plains of Texas.  Susan has poetry published in the UK webzine, Lighten Up On Line, The Daily Mail, and Openings (anthologies of poems by Open University Poets).

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10 Responses

  1. Mike Bryant

    I believe you have summed up the Brexit fiasco in eight hilarious couplets. As I read, I am anticipating the next internal rhyme or snigger. Really funny and beautiful!

  2. Joseph S. Salemi

    This is a perfect depiction of the arrogance and insufferable elitism of the anti-Brexiteers. They are determined to obstruct the expressed will of the British people, who have voted to leave the corrupt and bureaucratically tyrannical E.U. — a disgusting Smiley-Face version of the Third Reich.

    • Susan Jarvis Bryant

      You’re spot on, Mr. Salemi. Thank you for your perspicacious observation.

  3. C.B. Anderson

    Susan, you might have dropped a metrical stitch here and there, but once again you’ve nailed it.

  4. Brent Pallas

    Wonderful. Has the wit and tension of the best of Wendy Cope’s verse….even better in some ways.

  5. Susan Jarvis Bryant

    Thank you very much, Brent. I appreciate your comment for more than one reason: firstly, your insightful eye (it certainly lives up to your surname) and secondly, the Wendy Cope comparison. This gifted and witty poet is an inspiration of mine and I’m extremely flattered. You have made my morning!


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