On Your Marx

If humans ran a Human Race,
__Karl Marx would not be in it.
The human depth that he could trace
__would leach out in a minute.

For he is neither man nor beast
__but half-life near demonic,
A few kneels from satanic priest
__reversing good, moronic.

To cut a person into class
__is not a humane measure:
He chops down people to a mass,
__to flesh devoid of pleasure,

To muscled skills and cashiered meat,
__closed categories of earning,
To things that can’t think on their feet
__bogged down in certain learning,

No open mind, no breath-take view,
__no argument, no comeback,
No rights, no gifts, no geeks, no Jew,
__identity a thumbtack.

Karl Marx’s thoughts are aliens
__to humane, human living,
Shell-less eggs from headless hens
__that block the mesh when sieving.

As glutenous as childhood sweets,
__addictive, raw, and cloying,
They’re infantile and bait the streets
__his suckers are destroying.



Get Set

If Marx snuck in this Human Race,
__his power would diminish.
His running mates might set the pace
__but he would never finish.

He did not end Das Kapital,
__Fred Engles had to do it.
With no help from his bourgeois pal
__you could say that he blew it.

He blew off steam in poetry,
__both Hell’s and his, in tandem,
But left them in Lost Property
__unfinished like Oulanem.

Oulanem, his abandoned play,
__in which the world is “viscous”,
“detestable”, “slugs” all the way
__from bottom to meniscus.

To him all life is less than him,
__he’ll brook no competition.
To win means breaking life and limb,
__be wiped out by perdition.

For he would be The Universe,
__the Devil’s God’s Dictator,
For him there could be nothing worse
__than meeting his Creator.

So he would run from Majesty,
__his back be cracked and bending,
For such as he there will not be
__a finished, happy ending.



Go To Hell

From thund’rous Earth, a death note bell—
__magnetic, swinging, growing—
It’s calling Marx to go to Hell
__and Marx prepares his going.

He is the Bailiff of his Court
__who won’t allow defiance.
He calls up those who’ve bought his thought
__like some debt-pegged appliance.

He’s calling in his Master Plan,
__this world’s complete recession,
Where those who still call him “great man”
__must follow in procession.

His values wring mud-weighted chains,
__no Spirit-lift solution,
Inflamed class war, void-surplus pains,
__incessant revolution.

Both Adam Smith, John Stuart Mill
__were advocates for morals.
They did not weave their work to kill
__or grind in constant quarrels.

These human World economists
__did not seek Earthly power,
Nor wreckage wrenched by fools and fists,
__nor crave praise by the hour.

The backers who still stick by Marx
__with storm or hostile silence,
To Hell’s deep cook pot’s frothing sparks
__will boil down with his violence.



Damian Robin is a writer and editor living in the United Kingdom.

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24 Responses

  1. Dave Whippman

    Clever stuff, and very probably accurate. Everything I’ve read about Marx suggests he was a deeply unpleasant person with no human warmth.

    • Damian Robin

      Thanks Mr Whippman. I agree with your observation on Marx’ character. So, why do people take up the stomach-churning views of someone demonically unpleasant with no human warmth and try to use them to ‘fix’ the human world? Sick-making and irrational.

  2. James Sale

    Great fun – thanks Damian – someone worthy to attack and parody. As Theodore Dalrymple observed: ‘… he [Marx] wrote as a man who, as far as is known, had never taken the trouble to canvass the living views of anyone but himself.’

  3. Julian D. Woodruff

    Maybe Mr. Damian (or other interested) could trash Alinsky, Marcuse, and other Marx disciples currently infecting western political thought.

  4. Jeff Eardley

    Damian, I am guessing that you are no fan of Marx! As an Englishman, you may recall the mischievous Monty Python sketch where Marx is taking part in a TV game show and fails to answer questions on English football teams. Thank you for a lovely, enjoyable and irreverent piece that I enjoyed immensely.

    • Damian Robin

      Hi Jeff, thank you. With his strange willpower, Marx may have been able to conjure ten or more others of himself to make a football team but, like Monty Python suggested, he would have had little knowledge of other teams — which means, as in true life, he would lose in the end. :^)

  5. Margaret Coats

    A poetic essay–well structured in three parts, with fast-paced rhythm suited to easy reading. Effective ending to all three distinctly “instructive” sections, and it’s fun, too! Most of all, I like the candied conclusion to the first of these poems.

    • Damian Robin

      Thanks, Margaret Coats. Your posts and remarks on SCP are astute and clear so I’m dizzied and delighted by your comments.

  6. Damian Robin

    Hi Jeff, thank you. With his strange willpower, Marx may have been able to conjure ten or more others of himself to make a football team but, like Monty Python suggested, he would have had little knowledge of other teams — which means, as in true life, he would lose in the end. :^)

  7. Susan Jarvis Bryant

    Damian, this insightful and perfectly executed poetic depiction of the frightful Karl Marx brings to light the sheer horror the human race will face if his system of ideas and ideals is fully implemented. I hope the world comes to its senses soon.

    As for Theodore Dalrymple – I’m a huge fan. I thoroughly recommend “Admirable Evasions: How Psychology Undermines Morality”. This gets hold of every excuse made in the name of psychological impairment and tells the bold, barefaced truth of why pseudo science has led to huge problems in today’s world.

    Thank you for speaking out with powerful poetry, Damian. Never stop!!

    • Damian Robin

      Thanks for the encouragement, Susan. The book you recommend is duly noted. I don’t know how I have missed Dalrymple. He is in my landscape now.

  8. C.B. Anderson

    Nice work, Damian. Though Marx is an easy target, you pushed through the envelope with many a well-placed dart. The reason that intelligent Marxists cannot pierce the veil of their delusion is that Marxism is not part of economic science but merely an example of economic religion.

    • C.B. Anderson

      And I loved the way the three poems (and their titles) dove-tailed into a solid piece of cabinetry.

    • Damian Robin

      Good point. The CCP, the last big communist state, not does not believe in Marxism as it believes in nothing but itself. It is God (unto itself and its subjugated minions and willing suckers).

      • Damian Robin

        I’ll shave out of your remarks a wardrobe of praise as you, Kip, are a master craftsman.

  9. BDW

    Mr. Robin is right to go after the source of New Millennial wickedness and stupidity, especially now that we find thousands of CCP members in companies around the World, furthering a technocratic oligarchy for top leaders (führers) and a crass, idiotic marxism for the rest of humanity whose jobs have been squelched, thereby placing them in food lines. As Solzhenitsyn put it: “Ideology—that is what gives evildoing its long-sought justification, and gives the evildoer the necessary steadfastness and determination.”

    • Damian Robin

      Thanks BDW
      “especially now that we find thousands of CCP members in companies around the World”
      Yes, DBW, the slop plot thickens. As well as the recent publication of one-and-a-half million CCP Members names and some details of their infiltration into international and national businesses, that you may be alluding to, there is also


      From half way, 45mins, Joshua, Our Revered Vice-President at the SCP (and prize-winning investigative journalist) goes into detail about ownership of Dominion voting machines and the strong and multiple connections with the CCP.

      • Damian Robin

        Apologies, BDW, for miss-spelling BDW, here in the second mention.

  10. Damian Robin

    Having said that about Evan’s doctored picture:
    Here’s something in plain view, demonic nature in China:

    China Fashion Week is an international fashion event held twice a year at various venues in Beijing, China. Designer Hu Sheguang dressed models head to toe in red latex and prosthetics with plenty of fake blood.

    • Damian Robin

      In places, there is Hell on Earth,
      in minds forever proctored —
      Tradition’s killed, God has no worth,
      with butcher’s red, life’s doctored.

      [as most here will know, a proctor is a supervisor or monitor who invigilates examinations, enforces discipline, etc]


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