Photo by Daniel Stinson‘Texas Freeze (surely an oxymoron)’ by Susan Jarvis Bryant The Society February 16, 2021 Humor, Poetry 35 Comments . For others it may be a breeze. Those hardy Arctic folk would wheeze With laughter as we Texans sneeze __And shiver. This slick of ice and lick of snow; This frightful bite as ill winds blow Nips our fingers, numbs our toes— __We quiver. All those of us who brave the swell Of sweat-and-sear in singeing hell Are wailing in this alien spell __Of weather. We’re creatures of the solar blaze With iced tea and Tequila ways; We won’t embrace these cocoa days— __Not ever! . . Susan Jarvis Bryant is a church secretary and poet whose homeland is Kent, England. She is now an American citizen living on the coastal plains of Texas. Susan has poetry published in the UK webzine, Lighten Up On Line, The Daily Mail, and Openings (anthologies of poems by Open University Poets). 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Share this:Click to share on Twitter (Opens in new window)Click to share on Facebook (Opens in new window)Click to print (Opens in new window)Click to share on LinkedIn (Opens in new window)Click to share on WhatsApp (Opens in new window)Click to email this to a friend (Opens in new window)Click to share on Pinterest (Opens in new window) 35 Responses Gail February 16, 2021 Well, you managed to make a snowman, and I don’t think he’s a midget. And a delightful ditty. Reply Susan Jarvis Bryant February 16, 2021 Thank you, Gail. Although, I must confess, I didn’t make that snowman… Evan chose the picture and that snowman is way too big! Lol Reply Bruce E. Wren February 16, 2021 Ha! As Gail said, delightful! Reply Susan Jarvis Bryant February 16, 2021 I’m thrilled you like my funny little poem, Bruce… the conditions here in Texas inspired me write it in fifteen minutes flat… I fear it shows! Reply Jeff Kemper February 16, 2021 I love it! I don’t know whether I’d embrace a Texan summer, but here’s my word to a northern winter: Make my day: Go away! Reply Susan Jarvis Bryant February 16, 2021 Jeff, thank you for the giggle. I used to take snow and freezing conditions in my stride back in England. Ten years of living in Texas has turned me into a weather wimp… Make my day, go away! indeed! Reply Joseph S. Salemi February 16, 2021 It even snows occasionally in the Sahara. Check out the Rubaiyat, quatrain 14: The Worldly Hope men set their Hearts upon Turns Ashes — or it prospers, and anon, Like Snow upon the Desert’s dusty Face Lighting a little Hour or two — is gone. Reply Susan Jarvis Bryant February 16, 2021 Joe S., I love it. The sad thing is, Texas doesn’t do snow and ice. We’ve had no power for two days and now no water. The gas stations are shut down, so we’re using our generator sparingly. I’m using my cell phone to communicate, with my eye on the battery, and I’m in bed under the only thick duvet we own at 7:15pm… all for a dusting of snow… one has to laugh! Reply Jeff Eardley February 16, 2021 Susan, hope the humming birds are getting through this. By the way, it’s nice and warm over here. Reply Susan Jarvis Bryant February 16, 2021 Jeff, our syrup feeder froze solid, so I’ve been putting fresh helpings out for our little chap at regular intervals. He’s thriving in spite of the conditions. I bet he regrets his silly decision not to migrate! We’ve put seed out for the other birds and some fruit… a baby possum was eating the fruit earlier. Our backyard looks like a snow scene from Snow White. I’m glad you’re warm over there… I’m no longer a hardy British specimen who can endure harsh winters… I’m freezing my arse off! I must be a fully fledged Texan. Lol Reply Jeff Eardley February 17, 2021 Perhaps you’JJ get to see Tex Gritter after all. Susan Jarvis Bryant February 17, 2021 Yay! Tex Gritter, here I come! C.B. Anderson February 16, 2021 Shit happens. Where is global warming when we really need it? Reply Susan Jarvis Bryant February 16, 2021 C.B., I’m thanking my lucky stars the planet has been stricken with the horrors of global warming since 1988… this Texas freeze would have been unbearable without it. Reply Paul Freeman February 17, 2021 Of course global warming is a climate trend, not a weather phenomenon. Reply Mike Bryant February 16, 2021 I love this beautiful poem. Exactly the right way to look at problems. “When will politicians wake up and realize that renewable energy almost always equates to unreliable energy?” Probably never… this article notes that 23% of electricity in Texas is from windmills. They don’t work when they are covered in ice. There’s a great picture of an ice-glazed, bird-chopping, eyesore of an eighteenth century crucifix here: https://wattsupwiththat.com/2021/02/15/texas-frozen-wind-power-outages-ensue-electricity-now-at-unheard-of-9000-per-megawatt-hour/ Reply Joseph S. Salemi February 16, 2021 In France the great bulk of electrical energy is generated from nuclear “breeder” reactors that produce abundant and cheap electricity. As a result there are no blackouts in France, and they don’t owe a damned thing to the Arabs. But nuclear “breeder” reactors are banned in the U.S. because of our brain-dead environmentalist fanatics. Reply Susan Jarvis Bryant February 18, 2021 Joe S., EDF used to be one of the main suppliers of electrical energy in Britain. I haven’t lived in the UK for ten years, but during the snowy winters of 2009/10 Britain was in fuel poverty. The government were giving fuel payments to the elderly so they didn’t perish. I agree with you on the nuclear front, but the French people still face power cuts and electricity rationing. This is not because of the nuclear power, it’s because of the government… I’m certain Macron will never go short of heat. Paul Freeman February 19, 2021 You’re making the same mistake as former President Trump. Windmills grind wheat. Wind turbines generate power. And the reason the wind turbines froze was because Texas did not purchase the cold weather package – anti-freeze in effect. The wind turbines are still turning fine in Greenland. Reply Mike Bryant February 19, 2021 They don’t generate enough power to qualify as turbines. They make bread for politicians and those that feed at our trough. Mike Bryant February 19, 2021 The cold weather package was not recommended for Texas. It is not anti-freeze, it is heating that is dependent on the electric grid. Some large windmills circulate heated water through the blades… which is ridiculous since these monstrosities are only capable of producing 20 to 33% of nameplate capacity. The heat, of course, reduces their laughable efficiency even further. Also, when all steps of the manufacture, transportation, construction, maintenance and decommissioning are accounted for, they are not even carbon neutral. They are built for one purpose only – to bilk taxpayers. Yael February 16, 2021 Nice poem Susan. I do hope and pray that you’ll be able to get back to your normal weather soon. I wonder if Raytheon and Lockheed Martin have a consumer complaints department? Reply Susan Jarvis Bryant February 18, 2021 Thank you, Yael… we’re nearly there. We have our power and water back. We just have to through one more smaller freeze tonight and we can look to the horizon for sunshine. As for Raytheon and Lockheed Martin’s consumer complaints department… I’m on it. 😉 On a completely different subject, I noticed on one post you mentioned marzipan. I adore marzipan. It takes me back to Christmases and weddings, where we have a layer of marzipan on a booze-soaked fruit cake covered with a layer of icing. Simply because I read your comment, I’ve been craving marzipan during this freeze. Marzipan is scarce in Texas, and I simply can’t stop thinking about it… I feel a marzipan poem coming on. 🙂 Reply Yael February 18, 2021 You too? Must be a European thing. It seems to lead to life-long addictions and easily-triggered overwhelming cravings for more of it. In my family it was chocolate glazed German chocolate cake, soaked in rum, with layers of apricot jam and marzipan, with cherries on top. It was life-shorteningly awesome! Hint: You can order real Marzipan off the internet. Norma Okun February 17, 2021 Song: “Blow, blow, thou winter wind” by William Shakespeare has kept me warm. In spite of the frost, ingratitude seemed to be the worst. Nicely written poem Susan, sorry you are suffering such awful storm. Reply Susan Jarvis Bryant February 18, 2021 Thank you very much for your comment and kind words, Norma. I hope you’re a little warmer where you are. Reply Norma Okun February 18, 2021 Yes, there is snow. It falls over the mountains nicely. Vacation for people who enjoy skiing who usually have to put chains on their wheels. It is on the Sierra. I live between the Pacific Ocean and Lake Tahoe. You will probably get some water supply from us. I am glad that it is almost over. What a nightmare. Paul Freeman February 17, 2021 When Susan went across the Pond A cowboy shirt and hat she donned, of warming sunshine she was fond – Poor Suzy! Enjoy it while it lasts – oh, and I loved the poem. Saw the Alamo on TV covered in snow, yesterday. Reply Susan Jarvis Bryant February 18, 2021 Thank you very much for your lil poem, Paul… I love it! I arrived in Texas in 2011 during a heatwave and thought I would never adapt to or even survive the heat. I craved the chill of the UK climate, where I could fling open a bedroom window and breath in its sharp freshness without a snake slithering in… now, not so much. lol I have been to the Alamo several times and it never fails to take my breath away. I’ve never seen it covered in snow – what a rare sight! Reply Dan Leach February 17, 2021 Susan-I literally feel your pain, living as I do in Houston. What we are experiencing is the perfect storm of right wing, radical free market economics and left wing radical environmentalist irrationality. Hopefully, this will induce our fellow citizens to rethink their axioms. In the meantime, I’m curling up with a volume of Poe, a flashlight and a bottle of scotch. Nice little poem, by the way. Reply Susan Jarvis Bryant February 18, 2021 Dan, you are a gentleman after my own heart. What better way to deal with these frigid days than a torch, a tipple, and a tome of fine poetry… Poe’s the way to go! Reply Mike Bryant February 17, 2021 Texas’ decision to deploy wind turbines instead of gas-fired power plants was made by politicians willing to raid the treasury and put the lives of Texans at risk. Of course, their schemes depend on a misinformed public and also those feeding at the public trough. When the wind blows too hard or not at all, people die. https://wattsupwiththat.com/2021/02/17/when-smart-people-get-the-climate-crazies/ Reply Lyrics Ltd February 17, 2021 Nice poem Susan. I do hope and pray that you’ll be able to get back to your normal weather soon. Reply Susan Jarvis Bryant February 18, 2021 Thank you very much. Reply an'ya March 4, 2021 Susan, I’m just catching up, but this one of yours from February, is a good read and gave me a good chuckle. love ya, an’ya Reply Leave a Reply Cancel ReplyYour email address will not be published.CommentName* Email* Website Notify me of follow-up comments by email. Notify me of new posts by email. This site uses Akismet to reduce spam. Learn how your comment data is processed.