.

Reality—Plan B

If you don’t like the world the way it is,
And think that “he” should be the same as “she,”
And “hers” be interchangeable with “his,”
Then come up with a new philosophy.

Embrace alternative reality
Where “all of the above” is just as right
And true as “true” and “false” once used to be;
And “racist” is synonymous with “white.”

No other “truths” have credibility,
For if you think that something’s true, it’s true—
You can’t be wrong and I can’t disagree;
There can’t be any other point of view.

And if I dare defy you to your face
Your victim card will put me in my place.

.

.

James A. Tweedie is a retired pastor living in Long Beach, Washington. He has written and published six novels, one collection of short stories, and three collections of poetry including Mostly Sonnets, all with Dunecrest Press. His poems have been published nationally and internationally in The Lyric, Poetry Salzburg (Austria) Review, California Quarterly, Asses of Parnassus, Lighten Up Online, Better than Starbucks, WestWard Quarterly, Society of Classical Poets, and The Chained Muse.

NOTE TO READERS: If you enjoyed this poem or other content, please consider making a donation to the Society of Classical Poets.

The Society of Classical Poets does not endorse any views expressed in individual poems or commentary.


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19 Responses

  3. Cynthia Erlandson

    Very clever — and true in a way that only sarcasm can reveal. Sadly, we just can’t be sarcastic enough any more; certain sorts of readers would take this seriously.

    Reply
  4. Joseph S. Salemi

    Very apt and pithy. The supremacy of the imagined “victim” now looms over the West, and is the prime instrument of our degradation and enslavement. The left makes no bones about this, and refers openly to “the protected classes” (i.e. those who cannot be answered, questioned, criticized, resisted, or even defended against when you are attacked).

    Reply
  6. Martin Rizley

    Good things often come in small packages, and your poem is a good example of that. Though brief, it says a lot in a few words, with clarity, humor, and poetic skill. You dispatch the present insufferable “woke” culture with a well-placed knock-out punch!

    Reply
  7. Sally Cook

    James, you have developed a way of getting to the core of the apple and dispelling the worm that pleases me in many ways.
    Please keep it up !

    Reply
  8. Peter Hartley

    James – excellent, this is, and as pithy and trenchant as a Pope epigram, only better; and so true, it’s untrue. Why on earth should so many leftie feminists assume that the centuries-old tradition of using “him” and “his,” where gender is unspecified, is a concerted assault against the female sex?

    Reply
  9. Julian D. Woodruff

    Brilliant, as usual.
    I will admit, James, things are mighty bad.
    But then again, maybe we should be glad
    if all they do is flash their victim card,
    when some of them would make of us chopped chard.

    Reply
  10. James A. Tweedie

    Ty all. Evan gave it the title which is fine, but although gender identity is in the spotlight the poem is really intended to be broader in scope, embracing a critique of the whole of postmodern, deconstructive thought that denies objective truth/reality and reduces truth to the level of competing narratives where subjective truth is de facto asserted and subsequently imposed by social and/or legal fiat.

    Reply
  11. C.B. Anderson

    I don’t mind persons creating fantasies about their own identities nearly as much as I mind perverse attempts to undermine proper word usage and established grammatical norms in a perfectly functional English language. And I’m not partial to attempts to undermine biology, either.

    Reply
  12. Paul Freeman

    The third quatrain does indeed resonate, what with all the disagreements going on over election validity, masks, vaccines, etc.

    Reply
  13. David Watt

    The first stanza perfectly describes the recent decision by the I.O.C. to let
    biological males compete against women. All they must do is claim
    transgender status.

    Reply
    • Joseph S. Salemi

      This is why some militant feminists like Robin Morgan loathe transsexuals.

      Reply
  14. Jeff Eardley

    Mr Tweedie, this says it all. On a day when one of our top universities has banned “he” and “she,” to be replaced by “they” and all M and F toilets are to be re-branded “Toilet,” I also read that we must all soon carry coloured “badges of pronoun” which has caused some of my mischievous friends to display home made badges of the very British “Meat and two veg.”
    I enjoyed this a lot. Thank you.

    Reply
    • Joseph S. Salemi

      Many colleges and universities now ask all students, faculty, and staff to specify what pronoun they wish to be addressed with by others — the choices are manifold (he, she it, they, shiz, and endless variations). Your choice is included on all official lists and communications that carry your name.

      “Whom the gods would destroy, they first make insane.”

      Reply
  15. C.B. Anderson

    Well, Joseph, I wouldn’t be surprised if our esteemed universities suddenly dropped biology from their curricula. Biology is, after all, nothing but an oppressive construction of a small number of white European men. This goes for any kind of science, but biology, especially, raises uncomfortable questions (and answers) for those who wish to walk down a twisted path.

    Reply
    • Joseph S. Salemi

      Kip, the long-range plan at many schools (to be done over the next twenty years or so) is to eliminate the departments of Classics, Religion, Foreign Languages, History, Fine Arts, and Philosophy as unprofitable. These subjects nowadays have a very limited number of enrolled majors, and therefore do not justify the expenses required to maintain their faculty and office space. This is certainly the plan at the C.U.N.Y. system here in New York. English will be kept as a subject, since it is seen as a kind of “service” department that encourages useful skills like reading, spelling and rudimentary prose.

      It’s not just the economic reason (though that would be quite enough for the philistine bean-counters and corporate types who now run higher education). It’s also the fact that the humanities as subjects are seen as hopelessly entangled with “white privilege” and “Eurocentrism.” That’s the final kiss of death in academia today.

      The hard sciences ( and all of the STEM subjects) will stay, because there is still a commercial demand for experts in those fields, and therefore many students flock to them. But there is no real commercial demand for degrees in Religion or Philosophy or the Classics. They’ll survive in the Ivy League schools, but as “prestige” markers (like Victorian mansions and full-rigged wooden schooners).

      Reply

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