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Forever Faun
In mottled shade of forest stood a faun
So still he seemed to be no living thing;
The sun beamed down, already he was gone—
His presence was a fleeting sign of Spring.
Once in the distant past, when earth was young,
Men saw the faun and prayed to gods that be
And chanted ancient hymns, no longer sung,
Believing by this ritual sorcery
That they could capture the spirit of the deer
And persuade it to give successful hunt.
No longer do we live in an age of fear;
With more sophistication we affront
The universe. And yet the faun’s still there,
And we remain so blithely unaware.
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Dr. Emory D. Jones is a retired English teacher who has taught in high schools and various community colleges. He has five hundred and seventy-two credits including publication in such journals as Writer’s Digest, Calliope, The Big Muddy, The Storyteller, Modern Poetry Quarterly Review, Gravel, Belle Reve Review, Common Ground Review, Pegasus, Falling Star Magazine, The Light Ekphrastic, Poetry Quarterly, Pasque Petals, The Literary Nest, The Avocet, The Cumberland River Review, Delta Poetry Review, Three Line Poetry and Encore: Journal of the NFSPS. He lives in Iuka, Mississippi.
The poem is charming. The only minor quibble I have – and maybe it’s just me – but when I read aloud the line “And persuade it to give successful hunt”, I detect four beats instead of five. Congratulations on your impressive publication history. Now that you’re retired, hopefully even more of your poetry will grace these pages!
It has five beats of you begin with a trochee, and apply a slight ceasura after it before you speed up going into triple rhythm of the transition from 2nd to 3rd foot (2nd foot Trochee, 3rd foot Iamb), this is substitition here, I think, and confidently read as such. It reads fine and well.
I will also add that it requires one to apply a ceasura after the masculine ending ‘deer’ of the previous line, it is an enjambement that induces deliberate reduction in pace of speaking. Try it perhaps, and see.
AND perSUADE it to GIVE sucCESSfull HUNT
I see what you mean. It does work when I try it your way.
I enjoyed the poem and the mystical messaging. That really elevated the sonnet. Some of the imagery is stunning.
I found lines 9 – 11 didn’t read well aloud for me – Cheryl cited line 10.
Perhaps ‘catch’ instead of ‘capture’ in line 9.
Thanks for the read, Emory.
‘And we remain so blithely unaware.’
is a really great line to end the poem. Loved this Emory, thank you.