Depiction of Charon rowing, by Gustave Dore‘A Note to Karen’ by C.B. Anderson The Society February 9, 2022 Humor, Poetry 20 Comments . A Note to Karen It’s been a bumpy ride, With bruises long endured By both the groom and bride. At last, my heart is cured Of you, and I am much Obliged that you agree Our lives should never touch Again, so now I’m free To say what’s on my mind. Essentially it’s this: If I should ever find Another nemesis Like you, I’ll float to Hell Convinced that hope is barren— The proper way to spell Your name, my dear, is “Charon.” . First published in Lucid Rhythms (2008) . . C.B. Anderson was the longtime gardener for the PBS television series, The Victory Garden. Hundreds of his poems have appeared in scores of print and electronic journals out of North America, Great Britain, Ireland, Austria, Australia and India. His collection, Mortal Soup and the Blue Yonder was published in 2013 by White Violet Press. NOTE TO READERS: If you enjoyed this poem or other content, please consider making a donation to the Society of Classical Poets. The Society of Classical Poets does not endorse any views expressed in individual poems or commentary. Share this:Click to share on Twitter (Opens in new window)Click to share on Facebook (Opens in new window)Click to print (Opens in new window)Click to share on LinkedIn (Opens in new window)Click to share on WhatsApp (Opens in new window)Click to email a link to a friend (Opens in new window)Click to share on Pinterest (Opens in new window)Trending now: 20 Responses Joseph S. Salemi February 9, 2022 Ha! What a great and unexpected ending. I hope this is purely fictive, Kip, and not an account of a real nemesis you endured. Notice how the poet has used enjambment to link all four quatrains, thus giving the trimeter lines an even faster flow than usual. Reply C.B. Anderson February 9, 2022 Evan hoped the same thing, Joseph. Fortunately this is just another fictive artifact. Reply Brian Yapko February 9, 2022 C.B., this poem is great sardonic fun. I, too, hope it’s not autobiographical. What I really like are the extremely subtle hints of the surprise ending. The bumpy ride (which, with the benefit of hindsight, may well refer to a boat); the throwaway use of the word “nemesis” which (with hindsight) invokes Greek mythology, and the floating to Hell which logically ripens into the Charon reference. Well done! Reply C.B. Anderson February 9, 2022 If this poem had been written recently, then perhaps I would have made more of the “Karen” idea. As it is, I think I probably just stumbled upon the Karen/barren/Charon coincidence. Such termagants really exist, I’m sure, and I’m just glad I didn’t marry one of them. Reply Gail Naegele February 10, 2022 Likely the most powerfully sophisticated parting disdain I’ve ever read. The phrasing and flow is excellent, and I agree the turnaround phrasing of stanzas enhance the flow even more! The comment of Bryan about the Mythological context was very interesting. Well done, thanks for the read! G. C.B. Anderson February 11, 2022 Thank you, Gail. I hope you hang around hereabouts for a good long time, and I am glad that it was a note I did not actually have to write Margaret Coats February 9, 2022 One more little artistic detail: the only feminine rhyme in the poem is the last–looking back to the title. Fun all round in the lucid rhythms, if not in the topic. Reply C.B. Anderson February 9, 2022 I might go to hell, Margaret, but I won’t be ferried there by my wife, thank God. Writing small poems like this is indeed a lot of fun. I believe that the name of the journal refers to a line in a Wallace Stevens poem (“Thirteen Ways of Looking at a Blackbird”): And lucid, inescapable rhythms. Reply C.B. Anderson February 9, 2022 David Landrum, the editor of Lucid Rhythms, had a good thing going for several years. He is also a damn good poet, and if you ever come across his name, he is almost always worth a read. Reply Yael February 9, 2022 That’s a fun take on the annoying Karen issue, thanks for the chuckles! Reply C.B. Anderson February 9, 2022 Fun for one and all, I guess, Yael. I thank you for the comment, and you are welcome to the chuckles. Reply Jeff Eardley February 9, 2022 Thanks for two new words for me, “Charon” and the wonderful “termagant” which my wife will think is a compliment when I call her that tomorrow. This is a most enjoyable antidote to any slushy love poetry that appears here next week. Reply C.B. Anderson February 9, 2022 As a matter of fact, Jeff, when I sent this poem to Evan as part of a group of three, I described them as anti-Valentine’s Day poems. I’m glad you caught my underlying intent. A word to the wise: Be careful what you call your wife; she might not be pleased to be called a shrew, unless she has a great sense of humor. Reply Julian D. Woodruff February 9, 2022 To me the most fun aspect of Karen, CB, is that it’s for once a guy grousing about the woman in his life rather than a woman complaining about how wretched her man and all others are. The latter category is maybe best represented by the work of a man–Cole Porter’s “I hate men” (speaking of shrews). C.B. Anderson February 10, 2022 As for me, Julian, I think the direction of such problems is about 50/50. David Watt February 11, 2022 Kip, you make a strong case for taking great care in choosing a life partner. There are definitely plenty of Karens out there for the unwary. Reply C.B. Anderson February 11, 2022 Yes indeed, David, though I suppose that where you live there are more Kylies than Karens. Reply David Watt February 13, 2022 We do have our share of Kylies. In fact, one of our neighbors was a Kylie M. Tamara Beryl Latham March 10, 2022 CB: Karen/Charon. Too funny! You said: “I described them as anti-Valentine’s Day poems. Be careful what you call your wife; she might not be pleased to be called a shrew, unless she has a great sense of humor.” My reply: Your wife could also turn the tables on you in a “Right back atcha” moment. 🙂 Charon is also a satellite of Pluto. With regard to Disney’s “Pluto” (the dog) you might just as easily be referencing the line, “All men are dogs” or stretching the dog/satellite image: “Laika,” was the first dog in space from Russia that Newsday referred to as “mutnik.” LOL! So, from her (your wife’s) perspective: “Happy Valentine’s Day.” : -) Reply Tamara Beryl Latham March 11, 2022 C.B. Anderson, As an aside, I thought about my response to you all night and wanted you to know I was just joking. Hope you didn’t take my comment seriously. Your poem was excellent. 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Joseph S. Salemi February 9, 2022 Ha! What a great and unexpected ending. I hope this is purely fictive, Kip, and not an account of a real nemesis you endured. Notice how the poet has used enjambment to link all four quatrains, thus giving the trimeter lines an even faster flow than usual. Reply
C.B. Anderson February 9, 2022 Evan hoped the same thing, Joseph. Fortunately this is just another fictive artifact. Reply
Brian Yapko February 9, 2022 C.B., this poem is great sardonic fun. I, too, hope it’s not autobiographical. What I really like are the extremely subtle hints of the surprise ending. The bumpy ride (which, with the benefit of hindsight, may well refer to a boat); the throwaway use of the word “nemesis” which (with hindsight) invokes Greek mythology, and the floating to Hell which logically ripens into the Charon reference. Well done! Reply
C.B. Anderson February 9, 2022 If this poem had been written recently, then perhaps I would have made more of the “Karen” idea. As it is, I think I probably just stumbled upon the Karen/barren/Charon coincidence. Such termagants really exist, I’m sure, and I’m just glad I didn’t marry one of them. Reply
Gail Naegele February 10, 2022 Likely the most powerfully sophisticated parting disdain I’ve ever read. The phrasing and flow is excellent, and I agree the turnaround phrasing of stanzas enhance the flow even more! The comment of Bryan about the Mythological context was very interesting. Well done, thanks for the read! G.
C.B. Anderson February 11, 2022 Thank you, Gail. I hope you hang around hereabouts for a good long time, and I am glad that it was a note I did not actually have to write
Margaret Coats February 9, 2022 One more little artistic detail: the only feminine rhyme in the poem is the last–looking back to the title. Fun all round in the lucid rhythms, if not in the topic. Reply
C.B. Anderson February 9, 2022 I might go to hell, Margaret, but I won’t be ferried there by my wife, thank God. Writing small poems like this is indeed a lot of fun. I believe that the name of the journal refers to a line in a Wallace Stevens poem (“Thirteen Ways of Looking at a Blackbird”): And lucid, inescapable rhythms. Reply
C.B. Anderson February 9, 2022 David Landrum, the editor of Lucid Rhythms, had a good thing going for several years. He is also a damn good poet, and if you ever come across his name, he is almost always worth a read. Reply
C.B. Anderson February 9, 2022 Fun for one and all, I guess, Yael. I thank you for the comment, and you are welcome to the chuckles. Reply
Jeff Eardley February 9, 2022 Thanks for two new words for me, “Charon” and the wonderful “termagant” which my wife will think is a compliment when I call her that tomorrow. This is a most enjoyable antidote to any slushy love poetry that appears here next week. Reply
C.B. Anderson February 9, 2022 As a matter of fact, Jeff, when I sent this poem to Evan as part of a group of three, I described them as anti-Valentine’s Day poems. I’m glad you caught my underlying intent. A word to the wise: Be careful what you call your wife; she might not be pleased to be called a shrew, unless she has a great sense of humor. Reply
Julian D. Woodruff February 9, 2022 To me the most fun aspect of Karen, CB, is that it’s for once a guy grousing about the woman in his life rather than a woman complaining about how wretched her man and all others are. The latter category is maybe best represented by the work of a man–Cole Porter’s “I hate men” (speaking of shrews).
C.B. Anderson February 10, 2022 As for me, Julian, I think the direction of such problems is about 50/50.
David Watt February 11, 2022 Kip, you make a strong case for taking great care in choosing a life partner. There are definitely plenty of Karens out there for the unwary. Reply
C.B. Anderson February 11, 2022 Yes indeed, David, though I suppose that where you live there are more Kylies than Karens. Reply
David Watt February 13, 2022 We do have our share of Kylies. In fact, one of our neighbors was a Kylie M.
Tamara Beryl Latham March 10, 2022 CB: Karen/Charon. Too funny! You said: “I described them as anti-Valentine’s Day poems. Be careful what you call your wife; she might not be pleased to be called a shrew, unless she has a great sense of humor.” My reply: Your wife could also turn the tables on you in a “Right back atcha” moment. 🙂 Charon is also a satellite of Pluto. With regard to Disney’s “Pluto” (the dog) you might just as easily be referencing the line, “All men are dogs” or stretching the dog/satellite image: “Laika,” was the first dog in space from Russia that Newsday referred to as “mutnik.” LOL! So, from her (your wife’s) perspective: “Happy Valentine’s Day.” : -) Reply
Tamara Beryl Latham March 11, 2022 C.B. Anderson, As an aside, I thought about my response to you all night and wanted you to know I was just joking. Hope you didn’t take my comment seriously. Your poem was excellent. Reply
