. Willy Wonky on the revision of Roald Dahl’s works The whacky wokester clowns employed at Puffin Are wrecking classics with exciting stuff in. They’re ditching all the derring-do and dark (The spunk and spark and funk and quirk and snark) For noggin-numbing, glum and humdrum dross That doesn’t make despotic critics cross. They’re swapping all that’s riveting and peachy For joyless crap that’s sappy, flat and preachy: Chocolate factories free from nuts and dairy, Aunties that aren’t spongy-spiky scary, Oompa Loompas tolerant and tall, No one ugly, beastly, fat or small. Next will be the toxic Harry Potter--- That white, wand-wielding, patriarchal rotter. . . Susan Jarvis Bryant has poetry published on Lighten Up Online, Snakeskin, Light, Sparks of Calliope, and Expansive Poetry Online. She also has poetry published in TRINACRIA, Beth Houston’s Extreme Formal Poems anthology, and in Openings (anthologies of poems by Open University Poets in the UK). Susan is the winner of the 2020 International SCP Poetry Competition, and has been nominated for the 2022 Pushcart Prize.