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Psalm 23: King David’s Version

When I was just a hungry sheep
__and I was lonely, lost and scared,
You somehow found me, fed me, led me,
__showed me just how much You cared.
When in the valley with its shadows
__that each prophesy my death,
Tho’ I hear every threat Death utters
__and I smell his putrid breath,
I walk in peace since You are with me,
__and I know You always were.
Your rod and staff, they bring me comfort
__causing all my doubts to blur.
Now you prepare a sumptuous feast
__and cause my cup to overflow
And when my foes ask how it happens,
__I know they will never know.
I have Your goodness and Your mercy
__always here with me as well.
It’s in Your presence, Holy Lord,
__where I would always like to dwell.

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Psalm 23: My Version

(Or the Ungrateful Wretch’s Version)

I thank You for my grass that’s green,
__But there are pastures that I’ve seen
With greener grass and worst of all,
__Compared to them, my pasture’s small.

And thank You for protecting me,
__But next time, I would like to see
A warning sign at Death’s dark vale
__So I can walk a safer trail.

You cause my cup to overflow.
__I thank You but thought You should know
A bigger cup would cut down waste.
__I’d like to have my cup replaced.

And thank You for anointing me,
__But You anointed secretly.
I’d like to have the whole world see
__That You have got big plans for me.

I thank You Lord for all you’ve done,
__For sending us Your perfect Son.
But I think if you’d really tried
__He needn’t have been crucified.

Despite Your wisdom and Your might,
__You sometimes don’t quite get things right.
So, when You’re unsure what to do,
__I offer my advice to You.

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Warren Bonham is a private equity investor who lives in Southlake, Texas 

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13 Responses

  1. Cynthia Erlandson

    A very clever unveiling of egotistical human nature. You’ve managed to make this poem both serious and humorous.

    Reply
    • Warren Bonham

      Unfortunately, I’m probably more closely aligned with the second one

      Reply
  2. Roy Eugene Peterson

    The first version is a beautiful interpretation of one of my favorite Bible chapters. The second version is a great thought-provoker with clever humor from the point of view of the ungrateful wretch. I loved them both very much.

    Reply
    • Warren Bonham

      King David had it easy since he didn’t worry much about rhyme or meter but I hope he would have approved of the up-dates.

      Reply
  5. Yael

    The second version is truly hilarious. I always want a bigger pasture and I love the idea of having my cup replaced. Brilliant!

    Reply
    • Warren Bonham

      I have a longer list I’ve been compiling that I hope to have the chance to present in person someday.

      Reply
      • Paul Martin Freeman

        Very clever and very witty, Warren!

        As it’s unlikely I shall ever have the opportunity to put them myself, I have a few gripes of my own you might care to add to your list.

  6. Sally Cook

    Your graceful way of writing reaches out to me. I wonder if the work you do has something to do with your style. Thanks for these.

    Reply
    • Warren Bonham

      I’m pretty new to this genre so I’m still fooling around with different styles but I do like a little humor thrown in. I’m glad you enjoyed them.

      Reply
  7. Margaret Coats

    Metrical psalms have been an attractive exercise for poets in English for centuries. You are the first I remember who adds his own amusing twist on the psalm to his own rendering of it. Good idea for a meditative pair of poems.

    Reply
    • Warren Bonham

      That sounds like a challenge. I like the concept of coming at something from multiple directions. I’ll see if I can come up with something else. Thanks for the kind words.

      Reply

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