.

Go Woke, Go Broke

Sports Illustrated’s prize was doing great.
Big bucks each year from the swimsuit edition.
But then it seemed keen to alienate
Its loyal customers with a new mission—
Put old, or fat, or trans folks on the cover,
With no idea that might be a gaffe,
As it was later shocked—shocked—to discover!
And now it’s letting go much of the staff.

.

.

Leftist Summary of Existential Climate Disaster

Due to climate change
__The whole wide world
__Will soon be toast.

And it’s beyond dispute
__Minorities
__Will be hurt most.

.

.

Contemporary Question

Speaking to the young cashier the older chap,
Said pleasantly how good-looking she was.
The woman seemed offended – generation gap?
Or somehow what a leftist worldview does?

.

.

No Pretense About His Defense

An old friend once played in the NBA.
One question he’s been asked up to this day –
Was there a time he guarded Michael Jordan?
His answer summarizes that misfortune:
“Yes, there were several times I had to do it,
But I don’t think that Michael ever knew it.”

.

.

Image

The image that I carefully create,
And nurture to sustain upon exam,
I hope someday to fully replicate,
So it can be exactly what I am.

.

.

Russel Winick recently started writing poetry after ending a long legal career. He resides in Naperville, Illinois.


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15 Responses

  1. Roy Eugene Peterson

    You have continued your fine and true tradition of writing pointed poignant humorous poems that both titillate and exhilarate, including the first one when I learned SI let go a lot of their staff that had no concept of marketing and were intent on their leftist fantasies. Each of these was succinct and meaningful.

    Reply
    • Russel Winick

      Thank you Roy. Last I heard, they were doing 9 different covers this year.

      Reply
  2. Joseph S. Salemi

    Besides the trannie Kim Petras fiasco, and the putting of other unattractive freaks on the magazine’s cover, there was the revelation that Artificial Intelligence was being used to write some of the articles.

    We don’t need Sports Illustrated anymore. Let it go down the drain.

    Reply
    • Russel Winick

      For decades I subscribed to Sports Illustrated to place in my law firm’s waiting area. I would always glance at the Swimsuit Edition’s cover to see the beautiful model. To each their own, but there would be no glancing by me anymore.

      Reply
  3. Phil S. Rogers

    Short, to the point, and a pleasure to read. Especially liked the humor in No Pretense About His Defense. Go Woke Go Broke, hits a nerve. Having been on a company’s board of directors for many years it is mystifying why huge organizations like Sports Illustrated, Anheuser Bush, Target, etc. are not smart enough to stay out of the political arena and just market their product to all.

    Reply
    • Russel Winick

      Thanks Phil. This is one of those situations where I find it regrettable that the fiduciary duty rules provide virtually no protection for stockholders.

      Reply
  4. James Sale

    Particularly like your Go Woke, Go Broke poem, Russell – so true and let’s hope lots more examples come into the public domain soon – and you get some more poetry out of these sad saps!!

    Reply
    • Russel Winick

      Thank you James – a compliment from you means quite a bit. I’ll keep trying to depict what is discovered.

      Reply
  5. Margaret Coats

    Russel, I like the logical disjunction between the parts of your “Leftist Summary.” If the whole wide world will soon be toast, it cannot be that anyone will be more burnt than another.

    You could have used “Complimentary Question” as the title for “Contemporary Question.” The leftist world view has left women of all ages ill at ease about accepting compliments, even when they appreciate them. Many fear that some diehard leftist will see a smile or hear a “thank you” and condemn the woman. This even happens with accepting little courtesies like opening doors, giving up a seat, or offering help to lift something heavy. My practice is to add a sweet honorific “sir” to my “thank you” with a smile.

    Congratulations on your “Image” creation! You could also reflect the inner desire to live up to one’s ideal of self by saying, “So I can be exactly who I am.” Your wording says it with another perspective, and both are admirable.

    Reply
    • Russel Winick

      Margaret – I always love your feedback, because you see EVERYTHING, sometimes even things I didn’t see myself. You are right about the title to “Contemporary Question – either would have been good. I witnessed the interaction depicted in that poem, and never understood it until reading your explanation. Thank you! But the biggest thanks is for your feedback on “Image.” I was hoping Evan would accept that poem in part because I was curious as to what you might say about it if he did. That’s a fact! And you certainly did not disappoint!

      Reply
  6. Julian D. Woodruff

    Very witty, Russel. I guess MJ’s awareness of your friend (& most other defenders) was like a jet passenger’s awareness of the Rockies beneath the cloud layer.

    Reply
    • Russel Winick

      Thanks Julian, for the kind remark and the apt analogy.

      Reply
  7. Adam Wasem

    Re: Go Woke, Go Broke, as my wife was just saying yesterday about all the former purveyors of attractiveness in print and in retail: I don’t want to see what I actually look like in those clothes, I want to see what I could look like. So said after her recent trip to Victoria’s Secret. And lo and behold, after a 4-year hiatus imposed by the woke, Victoria’s Secret is reviving its old supermodel lingerie shows, no doubt to the great relief of its customers and investors alike.

    Reply

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