1922 photo of interview (Internet Archive)‘The Interview’ and Other Poetry by Brian Yapko The Society December 22, 2024 Culture, Poetry, Satire 20 Comments . The Interview “Respect my grammar rules or else,” K said, “This interview will be extremely short. Or better yet, I’ll summon you to court.” My pulse raced. I could feel my face turn red. K said, “Respect my pronouns: ‘It and Them.’ My genderqueer identity’s protected. My tats, my piercings—all must be respected— A heady blend of neutral, butch and femme. “Don’t colonize me! Watch me blow my fuse If you use words which I find racial-loaded! I swear I’ll lose my shit if I am goaded, ‘Cause I’m not here to placate but accuse.” K smirked, “You look so pale! So white, so cautious!” I closed my eyes. K asked if I was ill. Indeed I was. Oh yes, I’d had my fill. “Let’s end this now,” I said. “I’m feeling nauseous.” Once gone, I inked K’s name out with a blob. The interview indeed was very short And something I was happy to abort. Believe me. It/Them did not get the job. . . Fifty Shades of Dawn The night can seem too short, the day too long, While both reflect our planet’s cosmic reel— Her daily dizzy axis-centered spin. But though the night be long, the day too short The sane don’t claim that day and night aren’t real. The Sun shines without weighing how we feel. The daylight’s length depends on latitude, As does the hour when sunlight must grow shorter. There are more complex stages even yet As when the dawn is neither dark nor bright. But while it might be said there’s no clear border, Such fine gradations don’t unravel order. For all things can be blurred out of existence When warped through science’s dogmatic creed. Note: 99 percent of mass is vacuum. And time is relative to the observer; And for that matter so are size and speed. But life is what we face, not what we read. To live our lives objective frames of reference Are necessary—they’re not idle chatter. It’s clever when we spot some new frontier And find the ambiguity within it. But common sense is truth which does not shatter. The landmarks which attend life truly matter. Your gender theories are thus sophistry— Like fifty shades of dawn, or ten, or none. What really matters when it comes to life Is male and female, just like day and night. Ignore such Truth and what is it you’ve won? Plus, who are you to rage against the Sun? . . Brian Yapko is a retired lawyer whose poetry has appeared in over fifty journals. He is the winner of the 2023 SCP International Poetry Competition. Brian is also the author of several short stories, the science fiction novel El Nuevo Mundo and the gothic archaeological novel Bleeding Stone. He lives in Wimauma, Florida. NOTE TO READERS: If you enjoyed this poem or other content, please consider making a donation to the Society of Classical Poets. The Society of Classical Poets does not endorse any views expressed in individual poems or commentary. Trending now: 20 Responses Joseph S. Salemi December 22, 2024 We’ve all known types like the freak described in the first poem, and they are certainly obnoxious and entitled when they show up for interviews. At one school where I taught, the chairman would privately warn the hiring committee: “Remember — we don’t hire any DAFWAAPS.” (This acronym stood for “Dumb-Ass F–k With An Attitude Problem.”) He kept our department blissfully free from such creeps for a long time. The second poem is one that is usually quite difficult to pull off — a heavily philosophical piece, with the Sun as the central image, and with the scientific details of the first four stanzas gradually but forcefully leading to the solid conclusion of the last. And the embedded triple rhyme (line 2, 5, and 6) in each stanza avoids the more intrusive regular rhyme scheme that might impede the flow of philosophical comment. Small note — you might consider omitting “therefore” in the first line of stanza 5, for metrical reasons, or else recast the line in some way. Brian, your work is always interesting , and just gets better and better! Reply Brian A. Yapko December 23, 2024 Thank you very much for the kind words, Joe. “The Interview” was an uncomfortable poem to write because my blood pressure kept going up. I’ve known this caricature of a person who is scarcely a caricature in multiple contexts. I would imagine academia would see more than its faire share. It/Them also had a purple mohawk, multiple piercings and a pentagram tattooed on their forearm. I very much appreciate your generous assessment of “Fifty Shades.” Thank you for pointing out the metrical infelicity which I arranged to have fixed yesterday. Also, I’m glad you noted the three out of six rhyming lines in each stanza. It did indeed help me concerning flexibility in articulating thoughts. I also felt that the 50/50 split (having 50% of the poem rhyme and 50% of the poem in blank verse) structurally reinforced the binary theme of the piece. Reply James Sale December 22, 2024 One of the purposes of poetry – though not a necessary one -is to remind us of ‘general truths’ and this you do superbly well: “What really matters when it comes to life Is male and female, just like day and night.” When others spend so much time trying to assert something else, we know they’ve gone down a rabbit hole. Nice one, Brian! Reply Brian A. Yapko December 23, 2024 Thank you so much, James! Poetry is a form which is uniquely suited to the presentation of “general truths.” For me, poetry is something of an invitation to find veiled insights and hidden dimensions of order. I’ve read quality poems which didn’t make me feel particularly good, but I’ve never read a quality poem which didn’t inspire me to look at the world just a little bit differently. Reply Roy Eugene Peterson December 22, 2024 Two excellent takes on gender identity with a blend of logic and science. “The Interview” certainly reflects the attitude of the younger misled generation not only in terms of the pronouns, but with the other considerations. “Fifty Shades of Dawn” is an apt title for such a fascinating poem with unusual rhyme scheme and creative word play. Reply Brian A. Yapko December 23, 2024 Thank you so much, Roy! I’ve paired satire with philosophy in the hope that it may get the deluded to think more deeply about a subject which has been grossly misunderstood by those who think they are compassionately promoting a good thing. Or by cynics who like the idea of breeding chaos and sterilizing children. Reply Susan Jarvis Bryant December 22, 2024 Brian, what a powerful pair of poems and what an impact they make! In the vivid five stanzas of “The Interview” you take the word “entitlement” to the loftiest level and adeptly convey all that is wrong with our victimhood-reigns-supreme culture. You have skillfully conjured the interview from hell – and what an obnoxious picture you paint. Every dynamite line packs a potent punch. This poem is highly entertaining, but more than that, it is a bold rejection of all the vile lies we have been sold on the gender-identity front. I’m glad sanity prevails in the closing stanza. Despite the playful title, I initially wondered why “Fifty Shades of Dawn” was paired with the “The Interview”. As I read further, all became clear. What an eloquent, reasoned, beautifully written piece that makes a grave point with an elegant touch. This masterful poem shines a bright spotlight on a warped ideology that is ruining many lives. Brian, thank you for highlighting this insanity in exemplary poetry. Very well done indeed! Reply Brian A. Yapko December 23, 2024 Thank you so much, Susan! I’m glad that “The Interview” was entertaining if not enjoyable. In fact, I suppose “enjoyable” is off the table for such a stressful poem featuring — as you correctly state — entitlement. Because the “candidate” is so bossy right from the start, I was hoping people would read K’s obnoxious arrogance as (wrongly) marking her as the employer, only to turn the tables in the last line and make it clear this arrogant little snot was only the interviewee. These wokesters can be like that. “I come to accuse.” Sanity had to prevail in that last stanza. It is, after all, a work of fiction! Thank you for the kind words about “Fifty Shades” as well. Paired with “Interview”, this set of two poems depicting issues of gender ideology was intended as a) disease b) diagnosis and cure. “Fifty Shades” was actually the first of the two to be written but it made me consider the arrogant ones who say there are 617 genders — because they say so, after all — without recognizing how everything is binary and everything has frontiers of ambiguity. I wasn’t sure if I wanted these two pieces as a set but the more I thought about it the better it seemed. I’m glad it worked for you. Again, many thanks, Susan! Reply Julian D. Woodruff December 22, 2024 Both very well thought out, Brian. Few job interviews are like a walk in the park or a round at Harry’s Bar. Why go out of the way to make them worse than they ordinarily are? If you knew this K and ran into it at a restaurant, you’d probably pay your bill & leave without eating. Quite a creative argument in the 2nd, but I doubt those who most need to hear the message would give it … well … the time of day. Reply Brian A. Yapko December 23, 2024 Thank you very much indeed, Julian! I have met many people like “K” — unfortunately. You’re quite right. I will go to great lengths to avoid them. The best I can say is I’ve never had the displeasure of actually having an interview with one of them — either in front of the desk or behind it. As for “Fifty Shades”… I appreciate the time of day reference. And, of course, you’re right. I’m pretty much preaching to the choir here. But you just never know. Reply Margaret Coats December 23, 2024 “Fifty Shades of Dawn” is a masterpiece. The celestial argument elevates it beyond denial, which you, Brian, show in the concluding line, asking whether your imagined interlocutor could “rage against the Sun.” Capitalizing “sun” sets it as a sort of god, or universal reference phenomenon for earthbound persons who necessarily observe its apparent motions. You are careful here not to speak of the sun’s motion, as that contradicts the accepted idea of the sun as motionless center of the solar system. Of course the sun moves in relation to other phenomena in observable space, but these motions are not relevant to daily lives of human beings on earth. The sun’s apparent motion to persons living on earth could be referenced, as even astrophysicists speak of “sunrise” and “sunset” and the time of these motions at different locations. But your care to avoid such speech accords with “science’s dogmatic creed.” The “dogmatic creed” that you decry refers to relativity and uncertainty and “ambiguities” which all have to do with the limits of human observation. Authentic scientists must recognize these, but will again acknowledge that they form no part of perception on the human scale. You cite “99 of mass is vacuum,” which refers to the model of atoms as spheres with electrons orbiting the nucleus. In this useful model, most of the space occupied by a body is empty (“vacuum”) most of the time–though this is incomprehensible in practice to the human senses. Still, you are right to show some contempt for the idea, as it is only a model that could be replaced by another (such as the atom being a collection of wave functions) which is equally meaningless to actual life. Your main task in the poem is to draw a rational distinction between the somewhat esoteric domain of science and the practical realm of living, where apparent motion of the sun creating day and night is inescapable. You accomplish this very capably, and explain it logically in reference to rotation and tilt of the earth. Thus you set up a situation in which gender theories can be recognized, but denied relevance as practical reality. You use another consideration (varying shades of light or dark produced by the sun around dawn) as observable but not quantifiable by the senses. This is most useful to your logic, as “shades of gray” is an expression very commonly used to bring pseudoscientific (and unmeasurable) relativity or uncertainty into supposedly realistic discourse. With the serious quality of argument comes wordplay to subtly reinforce logic. The best example is “dizzy axis-centered spin.” This deplores misuse of words (“spin”) on earth while suggesting the politically reprehensible “Nazi axis.” As subtle is the “fine gradations” containing incalculable “gray” areas. Too, formal English like the subjunctive in “though the night be long” suits the dignity of discourse in this poem. It almost seems as though wacky gender theories don’t qualify as a counterexample to the well-argued philosophy here. But in fact “male and female” are so pervasively significant in human life that they do correspond to “day and night.” In the current neglect to investigate and appreciate how so, we may be ignoring the very existence of a central truth in social science. In physical science, it is at least recognized and hoped that difficulties in observation may ultimately be overcome, in favor of a more satisfying comprehension of the universe. Brian, this poem moves in that hopeful direction for human relationships. I’ve not mentioned the proverbial wisdom style of several expressions, but let me use “don’t unravel order” to quote my favorite verse of Biblical wisdom. “Thou hast created all things in measure and number and weight” (Wisdom 11:21c). The hope of science and psychology could be ultimately to discern more precisely the order of creation. Reply Brian A. Yapko December 24, 2024 Margaret, how can I not be thrilled with the compliment of “masterpiece”! Thank you very much for this extremely generous assessment and for your careful and insightful commentary regarding a poem I was not sure people would understand let alone value. Your analysis digs deep into the me metaphors and language I used to try to present an argument about what you absolutely nail: “…gender theories can be recognized, but denied relevance as practical reality.” That’s the poem in a nutshell. Your background in science helps in your appreciation of what I was trying to do – address the fact that there are many scientific theories and insights which exist and which are compelling but which are essentially irrelevant to human life on Earth. As I try to accommodate the ideas of science, faith and human psychology it occurs to me that spending our lives contemplating the fact that solid objects are 99% non-existent is something of a trap. We can become so invested in this “deeper reality” that we forget that this is virtually academic. It has as much application to our real ordinary lives as investing time and energy in assessing which a quark is charmed or strange, which are the 5 or 7 or 19 dimensions that we can’t see or interact with and what are our counterparts like in the many parallel realities of the multiverse. Who cares? People sometimes become so invested in the concept of gradations (as you note) that all that is left is chaos. This is as true in human behavior as in science. We start with a clear concept: murder is wrong. Then we find exceptions. Well, what about in battle? What about capital punishment? So we start picking at the concept of homicide. We draw a line. Then we get to ideas like abortion. Or euthanasia. The line gets blurred. Then we start thinking of bodies as fodder for compost. And in the end we have gone from the idea that “murder is wrong” to the idea that life has no inherent meaning. I’m not saying that frontiers should not be identified and explored, but we are foolish to give them so much weight that they nullify the very concept they are intended to modify. This leads to gender theory and the nullification of the concept of binary sex. Gender theory and the concept of gender fluidity is an entirely subjective thing which similarly has no meaningful bearing on life on Earth. You can analyze and pick out the 617 different genders that such theorists claim to exist and in the end it is completely subjective garbage. It’s like having passionate arguments with someone over whether the “right” word for the fruit is “apple” versus “pomme” versus “manzana.” Pure sophistry which has no place in the world of reason and logic. I especially appreciate your close analysis of the language of the poem. I did not capitalize Sun to be a godlike entity, but I did intend to make it into a symbol of objectivty and so gave it that extra heft. In the end, when I discuss fighting against the Sun I have actually transformed the Sun from a symbol of objectivity into a symbol or even avatar of God. To me, this brought the astronomical metaphor home to where it belonged. I did not contemplate World War II using the word “axis” since its primary astronomical sense applies and there is no better word, but I am very grateful for your thoughts regarding the phrasing of “don’t unravel order.” That is, of course, a psychological phenomenon since order is order whether we see it or not. As per the Keats quote, we unweave the rainbow at our peril. I believe I could continue writing on a subject which I feel warmly about but time presses… and it’s Christmas Eve! Thank you again for your insightful and provocative comments, Margaret. Merry Christmas!!! Reply Mike Bryant December 23, 2024 Brian, I love both poems. They are arriving at a time when many are waking up to the fact that we have all been baffled with bullshit for far too long. “The Interview” is maddening, hilarious and satisfying. The maddening ravings of the entitled, the obvious hilarious idiocy of their endless proclamations and the satisfyingly apt comeuppance by the adult in the room together make for a perfect protest poem. You continue the unravelling of this pseudo-scientific house of cards in “Fifty Shades of Dawn.” Yes, “The Science” has plenty of rabbit holes, but we cannot live in them. Einstein knew the difference between men and women was night and day. It still is. You sum everything up perfectly in the last line. The madness really is a rage against the unenlightened, enabled by experts, enforced by government at the point of a gun and, thank God, finally being confronted by sanity. You, Brian, have been at the forefront of the pushback. These perfect poems are really all about the importance of the undeniable truth. Reply Brian A. Yapko December 24, 2024 Thank you so much, Mike! I’m so pleased that you enjoyed “The Interview” despite its (intentional) maddening quality. I tried to get “K” right and, I fear, I got “K” a little too right. As I mentioned above, writing this poem actually got my blood pressure up because I know this type only too well. I love your phrasing of “endless proclamations” because that is just so true! I’m also grateful for your insights regarding the “pseudo-science house of cards” which I address in “Fifty Shades.” So much “science” is actually irrelevant to our lives or outright destructive. I find gender theory to be the latter and extremely damaging as the picking apart of the binary nature of sex leads to absurdities, bad science (whatever happened to XX and XY chromosomes?) and the astonishingly vociferous amplification of the voices of those whose psychiatric disorders should be treated rather than normalized, bizarrely aggrandized and given preeminence. Thank again, Mike. Merry Christmas to you and Susan! Reply Mark Stellinga December 23, 2024 Two more excellent pieces, Brian, and thank you for so succinctly expressing what so many of us SCPers know to be the ‘Truth’, and done in a pretty tough rhyme scheme to boot! 🙂 Merry X-mas, my friend. Reply Brian A. Yapko December 24, 2024 Thank you so much, Mark! Actually, the rhyme scheme was a bit easier for me on Fifty Shades because I only had to use three rhymes per stanza leaving the rest to blank verse. That made it a bit easier to philosophize while giving me a 50/50 binary ratio that suited the poem. Merry Christmas to you and your loved ones as well! Reply C.B. Anderson December 24, 2024 Leaving aside the clarity of expression and the masterful execution found in these two poems, two thumbs up for the middle fingers you give to the weasly woke. Reply Brian A. Yapko December 24, 2024 Thank you for this great comment, C.B., which I find both gratifying and a great chance for a belly laugh! The “weasly woke” are a bane and a curse and I’m happy to flip them the bird whenever I get the opportunity. Changing subjects, let me now wish you a very Merry Christmas! Reply Patricia Allred January 4, 2025 Brian! I could feel the emotions in the first poem… memories that I wish I would forget. Almost akin to nightmares, though so long ago. The second poem shines with your poetic uniqueness. Reply Brian A. Yapko January 4, 2025 Thank you, Patricia! Nightmare is just about right! This is who we are up against. Happy New Year! Reply Leave a Reply Cancel ReplyYour email address will not be published.CommentName* Email* Website Δ This site uses Akismet to reduce spam. Learn how your comment data is processed.
Joseph S. Salemi December 22, 2024 We’ve all known types like the freak described in the first poem, and they are certainly obnoxious and entitled when they show up for interviews. At one school where I taught, the chairman would privately warn the hiring committee: “Remember — we don’t hire any DAFWAAPS.” (This acronym stood for “Dumb-Ass F–k With An Attitude Problem.”) He kept our department blissfully free from such creeps for a long time. The second poem is one that is usually quite difficult to pull off — a heavily philosophical piece, with the Sun as the central image, and with the scientific details of the first four stanzas gradually but forcefully leading to the solid conclusion of the last. And the embedded triple rhyme (line 2, 5, and 6) in each stanza avoids the more intrusive regular rhyme scheme that might impede the flow of philosophical comment. Small note — you might consider omitting “therefore” in the first line of stanza 5, for metrical reasons, or else recast the line in some way. Brian, your work is always interesting , and just gets better and better! Reply
Brian A. Yapko December 23, 2024 Thank you very much for the kind words, Joe. “The Interview” was an uncomfortable poem to write because my blood pressure kept going up. I’ve known this caricature of a person who is scarcely a caricature in multiple contexts. I would imagine academia would see more than its faire share. It/Them also had a purple mohawk, multiple piercings and a pentagram tattooed on their forearm. I very much appreciate your generous assessment of “Fifty Shades.” Thank you for pointing out the metrical infelicity which I arranged to have fixed yesterday. Also, I’m glad you noted the three out of six rhyming lines in each stanza. It did indeed help me concerning flexibility in articulating thoughts. I also felt that the 50/50 split (having 50% of the poem rhyme and 50% of the poem in blank verse) structurally reinforced the binary theme of the piece. Reply
James Sale December 22, 2024 One of the purposes of poetry – though not a necessary one -is to remind us of ‘general truths’ and this you do superbly well: “What really matters when it comes to life Is male and female, just like day and night.” When others spend so much time trying to assert something else, we know they’ve gone down a rabbit hole. Nice one, Brian! Reply
Brian A. Yapko December 23, 2024 Thank you so much, James! Poetry is a form which is uniquely suited to the presentation of “general truths.” For me, poetry is something of an invitation to find veiled insights and hidden dimensions of order. I’ve read quality poems which didn’t make me feel particularly good, but I’ve never read a quality poem which didn’t inspire me to look at the world just a little bit differently. Reply
Roy Eugene Peterson December 22, 2024 Two excellent takes on gender identity with a blend of logic and science. “The Interview” certainly reflects the attitude of the younger misled generation not only in terms of the pronouns, but with the other considerations. “Fifty Shades of Dawn” is an apt title for such a fascinating poem with unusual rhyme scheme and creative word play. Reply
Brian A. Yapko December 23, 2024 Thank you so much, Roy! I’ve paired satire with philosophy in the hope that it may get the deluded to think more deeply about a subject which has been grossly misunderstood by those who think they are compassionately promoting a good thing. Or by cynics who like the idea of breeding chaos and sterilizing children. Reply
Susan Jarvis Bryant December 22, 2024 Brian, what a powerful pair of poems and what an impact they make! In the vivid five stanzas of “The Interview” you take the word “entitlement” to the loftiest level and adeptly convey all that is wrong with our victimhood-reigns-supreme culture. You have skillfully conjured the interview from hell – and what an obnoxious picture you paint. Every dynamite line packs a potent punch. This poem is highly entertaining, but more than that, it is a bold rejection of all the vile lies we have been sold on the gender-identity front. I’m glad sanity prevails in the closing stanza. Despite the playful title, I initially wondered why “Fifty Shades of Dawn” was paired with the “The Interview”. As I read further, all became clear. What an eloquent, reasoned, beautifully written piece that makes a grave point with an elegant touch. This masterful poem shines a bright spotlight on a warped ideology that is ruining many lives. Brian, thank you for highlighting this insanity in exemplary poetry. Very well done indeed! Reply
Brian A. Yapko December 23, 2024 Thank you so much, Susan! I’m glad that “The Interview” was entertaining if not enjoyable. In fact, I suppose “enjoyable” is off the table for such a stressful poem featuring — as you correctly state — entitlement. Because the “candidate” is so bossy right from the start, I was hoping people would read K’s obnoxious arrogance as (wrongly) marking her as the employer, only to turn the tables in the last line and make it clear this arrogant little snot was only the interviewee. These wokesters can be like that. “I come to accuse.” Sanity had to prevail in that last stanza. It is, after all, a work of fiction! Thank you for the kind words about “Fifty Shades” as well. Paired with “Interview”, this set of two poems depicting issues of gender ideology was intended as a) disease b) diagnosis and cure. “Fifty Shades” was actually the first of the two to be written but it made me consider the arrogant ones who say there are 617 genders — because they say so, after all — without recognizing how everything is binary and everything has frontiers of ambiguity. I wasn’t sure if I wanted these two pieces as a set but the more I thought about it the better it seemed. I’m glad it worked for you. Again, many thanks, Susan! Reply
Julian D. Woodruff December 22, 2024 Both very well thought out, Brian. Few job interviews are like a walk in the park or a round at Harry’s Bar. Why go out of the way to make them worse than they ordinarily are? If you knew this K and ran into it at a restaurant, you’d probably pay your bill & leave without eating. Quite a creative argument in the 2nd, but I doubt those who most need to hear the message would give it … well … the time of day. Reply
Brian A. Yapko December 23, 2024 Thank you very much indeed, Julian! I have met many people like “K” — unfortunately. You’re quite right. I will go to great lengths to avoid them. The best I can say is I’ve never had the displeasure of actually having an interview with one of them — either in front of the desk or behind it. As for “Fifty Shades”… I appreciate the time of day reference. And, of course, you’re right. I’m pretty much preaching to the choir here. But you just never know. Reply
Margaret Coats December 23, 2024 “Fifty Shades of Dawn” is a masterpiece. The celestial argument elevates it beyond denial, which you, Brian, show in the concluding line, asking whether your imagined interlocutor could “rage against the Sun.” Capitalizing “sun” sets it as a sort of god, or universal reference phenomenon for earthbound persons who necessarily observe its apparent motions. You are careful here not to speak of the sun’s motion, as that contradicts the accepted idea of the sun as motionless center of the solar system. Of course the sun moves in relation to other phenomena in observable space, but these motions are not relevant to daily lives of human beings on earth. The sun’s apparent motion to persons living on earth could be referenced, as even astrophysicists speak of “sunrise” and “sunset” and the time of these motions at different locations. But your care to avoid such speech accords with “science’s dogmatic creed.” The “dogmatic creed” that you decry refers to relativity and uncertainty and “ambiguities” which all have to do with the limits of human observation. Authentic scientists must recognize these, but will again acknowledge that they form no part of perception on the human scale. You cite “99 of mass is vacuum,” which refers to the model of atoms as spheres with electrons orbiting the nucleus. In this useful model, most of the space occupied by a body is empty (“vacuum”) most of the time–though this is incomprehensible in practice to the human senses. Still, you are right to show some contempt for the idea, as it is only a model that could be replaced by another (such as the atom being a collection of wave functions) which is equally meaningless to actual life. Your main task in the poem is to draw a rational distinction between the somewhat esoteric domain of science and the practical realm of living, where apparent motion of the sun creating day and night is inescapable. You accomplish this very capably, and explain it logically in reference to rotation and tilt of the earth. Thus you set up a situation in which gender theories can be recognized, but denied relevance as practical reality. You use another consideration (varying shades of light or dark produced by the sun around dawn) as observable but not quantifiable by the senses. This is most useful to your logic, as “shades of gray” is an expression very commonly used to bring pseudoscientific (and unmeasurable) relativity or uncertainty into supposedly realistic discourse. With the serious quality of argument comes wordplay to subtly reinforce logic. The best example is “dizzy axis-centered spin.” This deplores misuse of words (“spin”) on earth while suggesting the politically reprehensible “Nazi axis.” As subtle is the “fine gradations” containing incalculable “gray” areas. Too, formal English like the subjunctive in “though the night be long” suits the dignity of discourse in this poem. It almost seems as though wacky gender theories don’t qualify as a counterexample to the well-argued philosophy here. But in fact “male and female” are so pervasively significant in human life that they do correspond to “day and night.” In the current neglect to investigate and appreciate how so, we may be ignoring the very existence of a central truth in social science. In physical science, it is at least recognized and hoped that difficulties in observation may ultimately be overcome, in favor of a more satisfying comprehension of the universe. Brian, this poem moves in that hopeful direction for human relationships. I’ve not mentioned the proverbial wisdom style of several expressions, but let me use “don’t unravel order” to quote my favorite verse of Biblical wisdom. “Thou hast created all things in measure and number and weight” (Wisdom 11:21c). The hope of science and psychology could be ultimately to discern more precisely the order of creation. Reply
Brian A. Yapko December 24, 2024 Margaret, how can I not be thrilled with the compliment of “masterpiece”! Thank you very much for this extremely generous assessment and for your careful and insightful commentary regarding a poem I was not sure people would understand let alone value. Your analysis digs deep into the me metaphors and language I used to try to present an argument about what you absolutely nail: “…gender theories can be recognized, but denied relevance as practical reality.” That’s the poem in a nutshell. Your background in science helps in your appreciation of what I was trying to do – address the fact that there are many scientific theories and insights which exist and which are compelling but which are essentially irrelevant to human life on Earth. As I try to accommodate the ideas of science, faith and human psychology it occurs to me that spending our lives contemplating the fact that solid objects are 99% non-existent is something of a trap. We can become so invested in this “deeper reality” that we forget that this is virtually academic. It has as much application to our real ordinary lives as investing time and energy in assessing which a quark is charmed or strange, which are the 5 or 7 or 19 dimensions that we can’t see or interact with and what are our counterparts like in the many parallel realities of the multiverse. Who cares? People sometimes become so invested in the concept of gradations (as you note) that all that is left is chaos. This is as true in human behavior as in science. We start with a clear concept: murder is wrong. Then we find exceptions. Well, what about in battle? What about capital punishment? So we start picking at the concept of homicide. We draw a line. Then we get to ideas like abortion. Or euthanasia. The line gets blurred. Then we start thinking of bodies as fodder for compost. And in the end we have gone from the idea that “murder is wrong” to the idea that life has no inherent meaning. I’m not saying that frontiers should not be identified and explored, but we are foolish to give them so much weight that they nullify the very concept they are intended to modify. This leads to gender theory and the nullification of the concept of binary sex. Gender theory and the concept of gender fluidity is an entirely subjective thing which similarly has no meaningful bearing on life on Earth. You can analyze and pick out the 617 different genders that such theorists claim to exist and in the end it is completely subjective garbage. It’s like having passionate arguments with someone over whether the “right” word for the fruit is “apple” versus “pomme” versus “manzana.” Pure sophistry which has no place in the world of reason and logic. I especially appreciate your close analysis of the language of the poem. I did not capitalize Sun to be a godlike entity, but I did intend to make it into a symbol of objectivty and so gave it that extra heft. In the end, when I discuss fighting against the Sun I have actually transformed the Sun from a symbol of objectivity into a symbol or even avatar of God. To me, this brought the astronomical metaphor home to where it belonged. I did not contemplate World War II using the word “axis” since its primary astronomical sense applies and there is no better word, but I am very grateful for your thoughts regarding the phrasing of “don’t unravel order.” That is, of course, a psychological phenomenon since order is order whether we see it or not. As per the Keats quote, we unweave the rainbow at our peril. I believe I could continue writing on a subject which I feel warmly about but time presses… and it’s Christmas Eve! Thank you again for your insightful and provocative comments, Margaret. Merry Christmas!!! Reply
Mike Bryant December 23, 2024 Brian, I love both poems. They are arriving at a time when many are waking up to the fact that we have all been baffled with bullshit for far too long. “The Interview” is maddening, hilarious and satisfying. The maddening ravings of the entitled, the obvious hilarious idiocy of their endless proclamations and the satisfyingly apt comeuppance by the adult in the room together make for a perfect protest poem. You continue the unravelling of this pseudo-scientific house of cards in “Fifty Shades of Dawn.” Yes, “The Science” has plenty of rabbit holes, but we cannot live in them. Einstein knew the difference between men and women was night and day. It still is. You sum everything up perfectly in the last line. The madness really is a rage against the unenlightened, enabled by experts, enforced by government at the point of a gun and, thank God, finally being confronted by sanity. You, Brian, have been at the forefront of the pushback. These perfect poems are really all about the importance of the undeniable truth. Reply
Brian A. Yapko December 24, 2024 Thank you so much, Mike! I’m so pleased that you enjoyed “The Interview” despite its (intentional) maddening quality. I tried to get “K” right and, I fear, I got “K” a little too right. As I mentioned above, writing this poem actually got my blood pressure up because I know this type only too well. I love your phrasing of “endless proclamations” because that is just so true! I’m also grateful for your insights regarding the “pseudo-science house of cards” which I address in “Fifty Shades.” So much “science” is actually irrelevant to our lives or outright destructive. I find gender theory to be the latter and extremely damaging as the picking apart of the binary nature of sex leads to absurdities, bad science (whatever happened to XX and XY chromosomes?) and the astonishingly vociferous amplification of the voices of those whose psychiatric disorders should be treated rather than normalized, bizarrely aggrandized and given preeminence. Thank again, Mike. Merry Christmas to you and Susan! Reply
Mark Stellinga December 23, 2024 Two more excellent pieces, Brian, and thank you for so succinctly expressing what so many of us SCPers know to be the ‘Truth’, and done in a pretty tough rhyme scheme to boot! 🙂 Merry X-mas, my friend. Reply
Brian A. Yapko December 24, 2024 Thank you so much, Mark! Actually, the rhyme scheme was a bit easier for me on Fifty Shades because I only had to use three rhymes per stanza leaving the rest to blank verse. That made it a bit easier to philosophize while giving me a 50/50 binary ratio that suited the poem. Merry Christmas to you and your loved ones as well! Reply
C.B. Anderson December 24, 2024 Leaving aside the clarity of expression and the masterful execution found in these two poems, two thumbs up for the middle fingers you give to the weasly woke. Reply
Brian A. Yapko December 24, 2024 Thank you for this great comment, C.B., which I find both gratifying and a great chance for a belly laugh! The “weasly woke” are a bane and a curse and I’m happy to flip them the bird whenever I get the opportunity. Changing subjects, let me now wish you a very Merry Christmas! Reply
Patricia Allred January 4, 2025 Brian! I could feel the emotions in the first poem… memories that I wish I would forget. Almost akin to nightmares, though so long ago. The second poem shines with your poetic uniqueness. Reply
Brian A. Yapko January 4, 2025 Thank you, Patricia! Nightmare is just about right! This is who we are up against. Happy New Year! Reply
