"Monkeys Feasting" by Breughel the Younger‘An Anti-Evolution Song’ by Evan Mantyk The Society August 15, 2022 Culture, Humor, Poetry, Science 31 Comments . An Anti-Evolution Song inspired by the writings of Zhang Tianliang How probable is it, however you spin it, __That man has evolved out of nothing? Do I look like a schmuck who would think that dumb luck __Could just randomly tweak and make something? Here’s where most will call “God!” but that’s even more odd __Though it helps you avoid ruffling feathers. Since this theory is broke such a “God” is a joke __Who’s restricted by bumbling tethers. There’s evidence lacking to give proper backing __To each intermediate step In Darwin’s menagerie—it’s a catastrophe __Biologists quietly schlep. With logic that’s circular they’re always particular __On advances that ancient man made; Their timeline is crucial so anything unusual __Must into their framework be laid. Just as humans defy the animal cry __For survival of only the fittest, They race to explain with infinite pain __“Something changed”—though they haven’t a witness. You are flawed fundamentally when you essentially __Require all science on your terms; While you think and you think into hubris you sink __And to pettiness tiny as germs. Your demands of an answer are those of a cancer __Unreasonably growing in size; Although you feel cool, Common Sense would yell “Fool!” __As you rush to fill gaps up with lies. Suppose you are walking (quite different from Hawking) __And find there’s a fine writing table. You conclude it’s oak wood, that the craftsmanship’s good, __And screws made of steel keep it stable. It says “Made in France,” which seems a strange chance __But otherwise you’re satisfied; You know where it’s from and the parts of its sum __And in knowing you feel gratified. But that’s not the whole picture, it’s merely a tincture __Compared to the table’s real tale Of man’s need to write, and perennial plight __To organize life without fail, To forge a great nation and civilization __Where language is written from thought; Of the need to believe that the words we conceive __Should be written and won’t be for naught. Take any away and the table won’t stay; __It’s created on levels more deep Than what you can measure or hoard as your treasure— __I shepherd while you play with sheep. . . Evan Mantyk teaches literature and history in New York and is President of the Society of Classical Poets. NOTE TO READERS: If you enjoyed this poem or other content, please consider making a donation to the Society of Classical Poets. NOTE TO POETS: The Society considers this page, where your poetry resides, to be your residence as well, where you may invite family, friends, and others to visit. Feel free to treat this page as your home and remove anyone here who disrespects you. Simply send an email to firstname.lastname@example.org. Put “Remove Comment” in the subject line and list which comments you would like removed. The Society does not endorse any views expressed in individual poems or comments and reserves the right to remove any comments to maintain the decorum of this website and the integrity of the Society. Please see our Comments Policy here. CODEC News:Share this:Click to share on Twitter (Opens in new window)Click to share on Facebook (Opens in new window)Click to print (Opens in new window)Click to share on LinkedIn (Opens in new window)Click to share on WhatsApp (Opens in new window)Click to email this to a friend (Opens in new window)Click to share on Pinterest (Opens in new window) 31 Responses Michael Pietrack August 15, 2022 Fun to read! In the end, either man created God or God created man. I’m of the latter belief. Reply Russel Winick August 15, 2022 Quite an interesting and well-written poem Evan. I’m rather curious to see what other readers’ comments will be. Reply James Sale August 15, 2022 Nice one Evan, nice one – like the meter! And FYI: ‘Absolute nothing cannot produce something, because if it had that ability, it would have something, and so it wouldn’t be nothing. From this we can conclude that something has always existed because something exists now. So far, we’re just using logic’ – Eric Hedin, Cancelled Science. But you already know! Reply Tonia Kalouria August 15, 2022 Dear Evan, Well- metered intellectual stimulator! Reply Evan Mantyk August 15, 2022 Thank you for your comments! Great quote, James. It is worth noting that Damian Robin’s poem published today was written independently from mine: https://classicalpoets.org/2022/08/15/images-of-darwin-post-1859-and-other-poetry-by-damian-robin/#/ It just so happened that we were thinking about the same topic and writing about it at the same time. The similar topic is also why they were published on the same day. Reply Joshua C. Frank August 15, 2022 Even more interesting, August 15 is the Feast of the Assumption of the Blessed Virgin Mary in the Roman Catholic Church; as a Catholic, I think this has something to do with both of you writing about this at the same time and having both poems published the same day… Reply Roy E. Peterson August 15, 2022 Evan, this is such an elegant song that vibrates with logic and elan. Your masterful meter and rhyming scheme are an inspiration as if from a dream. I especially am taken with the closing line, “I shepherd while you play with sheep.! There is a depth of thought about the theory of evolution and the effort “to organize life without fail.” This one speaks to me at all levels and demonstrates keen intellectual prowess. Reply Damian Robin August 15, 2022 I corroborate Evan’s comment. SERENDIPITY. Kismet Fate. While researching for further forays into evolutionism, I got near the point of surrender-dip-ity and getting sucked into the mesmerising dexterity of atheist and scientist Forrest Valkai on youtube. He’s like a liquor-bottle-juggling bar-tender. Reply David Paul Behrens August 15, 2022 I believe the concepts of God and evolution can coexist. You can’t get something out of nothing. If the big bang theory is true, something must have already existed. Something must have caused the big bang and we refer to that something as God, the eternal force behind all things, and it is beyond human comprehension. Reply Martin Rizley August 15, 2022 As you point out, it is very interesting to see how the big bang theory– a theory which some world famous scientists like Fred Hoyle do not accept as true– raises questions that seem unavoidably theological in nature. When people ask “what triggered the Big Bang?” science is forced to use a term like “transcendent causal agent” to give an answer. That is because if all matter and energy were compressed into an infinitessimal singularity, then time itself presumably would not exist– for there would as yet be no spread out fabric of space-time– so whatever triggered the big bang would have to exist outside the fabric of space-time, and that is what the word “transcendent” is getting at. I find that fascinating! A “transcendent causal agent” that exists outside of space and time and causes the universe to come into being spontaneously. Wouldn´t such a being seem necessarily to be self-existing, eternal and immaterial in nature? Sound like anything familiar? Yes, uncannily, like Genesis 1:1: “In the beginning, God created the heavens and the earth.” Reply Susan Jarvis Bryant August 16, 2022 Martin, I love your comment. For me, it speaks clearly of God’s hand in our creation, whatever language is used to describe Him… “a rose by any other name…” springs to mind. Thank you! David Paul Behrens August 16, 2022 A very interesting reply, Martin. Thank you! Alex W August 15, 2022 Excellent virtuosity Reply Cynthia Erlandson August 15, 2022 Great topic, Evan, and expressed with great virtuosity. The anapestic meter seems very appropriate, perhaps chosen because it has a sort of laughing rhythm to it, suitable for poking fun? Your internal rhyme also makes it fun, and there are some delightful ones: menagerie /catastrophe; circular/particular; crucial/unusual. And I think the analogy of the writing table is really thought-provoking: the idea that our need for the table — our need to write, and to use writing in the creation of civilization, is a factor which went into its creation — that there are “levels more deep” than are dreamt of in evolutionists’ philosophies. And speaking of “Hamlet” — Paul got me your book “Heroes of the East and West”, which I’ve just started reading, and I love “The Teacher to His Students”. Along with other references to “Hamlet” that I’ve been running across lately, it inspired me to re-read it. Reply Evan Mantyk August 15, 2022 Cynthia, glad you like the book! And if you want an unusual version of Hamlet to read, let me know and I will send you a PDF of this adaptation I made: https://www.amazon.com/Prince-Hamlet-Monkey-William-Shakespeare/dp/1097889386 Reply Cynthia Erlandson August 17, 2022 Thank you, Evan — I would love to read it! Brian Yapko August 15, 2022 Evan, this poem is both entertaining and illuminating regarding the weaknesses and incomplete segments in evolutionary theory and, most importantly, in the complete failure of the theory to explain where it all starts. I am one of those readers who also strongly believes in a divine origin of life, although I also certainly accept scientific explanations of how the mechanics of the universe work. (The how but not the why.) The poem’s meter propels your thoughts forward with unstoppable motion. I was interpreting the meter as dactylic tetrameter starting with headless iambs and would greatly appreciate a clarification on how you see the meter. As for the language and imagery, they are fantastically organized and lucid. A wonderful poem. Reply Evan Mantyk August 15, 2022 Thank you, Brian. Yes, you have exactly nailed the meter. This one was fun to write and I think that comes through. Reply Jeff Eardley August 15, 2022 Evan, a great fun and thoughtful piece that warrants a reading out loud. Our greatest evolutionist and author of “The God Delusion,” Richard Dawkins is about to release, for Christmas, his first children’s publication, “The Santa Delusion.” Should go down like a ton of bricks, hopefully not down the chimney. Reply James A. Tweedie August 15, 2022 What use and for why are the parts of the eye? Each alone by itself is a pretense. They are useless and droll unless part of a whole To assert “It just happened,” is nonsense. Nicely put and I like the lighthearted rhythmic bounce! Reply Evan Mantyk August 15, 2022 Thank you, Jim. One theory I have is that each poem has a meter or form that suits it perfectly. It is just a matter of finding it and then the poem will write itself, or at least write itself more easily, and read better. Reply Joshua C. Frank August 15, 2022 Great one! It fits in well with the anti-evolution song genre. Have you, by any chance, heard “The Evolution Song” by Kevin Lee or “The Banana Ballad” by Ichthus? I think you’ll enjoy both of those. Reply Evan Mantyk August 16, 2022 Thank you, Joshua! I enjoyed these and for other readers, you can find them here: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=7aLzWmPhyRA&t=7s http://freescripturesongs.org/the-banana-ballad-parody-on-evolution I think I had heard Kevin Lee’s song in the movie Expelled: No Intelligence Allowed. If you haven’t seen it, I recommend it: Reply Norma Pain August 16, 2022 Eric Hedin’s quote provided by James Sale, says it all for me: ‘Absolute nothing cannot produce something, because if it had that ability, it would have something, and so it wouldn’t be nothing. From this we can conclude that something has always existed because something exists now. So far, we’re just using logic’ – Eric Hedin, Thank you Evan, I enjoyed your poem very much. Reply Susan Jarvis Bryant August 16, 2022 Evan, what a wonderful piece! I love the form – the way it romps along with its toe-tapping beat and masterly internal rhymes. Serving up a contentious topic with a delicious helping of comedic relish is a stroke of poetic genius. Great stuff! Reply Gary Borck August 17, 2022 I, also enjoy the classical song formula you used here. It works well as a parody of evolution. Though, I respect different opinions on matters, it is hard to fathom how so many intelligent educated people can believe in evolution. Well written, Evan! Reply Sally Cook August 18, 2022 Ideas spark and swirl and settle on us at random.Once one nips you on the noggin it is up to you to make something of itl This is the reason for coincidence, and why two poems may suddenly appear, full fledged, on the same daiy, about the same subject. Fine poem, Evan ! Reply Adam Wasem August 18, 2022 Nice entertaining read. That internal rhyme and pseudo-limericky meter just pulls the reader right along. I also enjoyed your poetic spin on the Argument from Design,I.e., a table is of course not just a random assemblage of wood and screws, but must have a designer who designed it for a purpose. It’s good to remind those, as Frost noted, who are growing “ever more bigoted in their reliance/ on the gospel of modern science,” that “there is more to heaven and earth than is dreamt of in their philosophy,” as another writer noted. One small solecism I caught: the word is “hoard” instead of “horde” in the final stanza, but still, well and entertainingly done. Reply fred schueler September 13, 2022 On Jun 17, 2016, at 12:48 PM, Fred Schueler wrote: …ooh I ought to be working, but this just came to me in the tune of ‘Battle Hymn of the Republic:’ Feasting on Conolophus to the Conclusion of Consanguinity Feeding on the Land Iguana Darwin had the great idea A simple mechanism that made everything so clear If all creatures are related we’re obliged to hold them dear as Life goes marching on. In the small warm pond the globules coalesced and learned to thrive In a thousand generations they began to be alive The entangled bank’s the consequence of their selected drive as Life goes marching on. When Prokaryotes engulfed themselves Lynn Margulis was there with a checklist of engulfings and the benefits they shared: Chloroplastic mitochondrial eukaryotic flair As life went marching on. In his hammock in Malaysia fevered Wallace saw it plain: There are facts of distribution that descent alone explains, If you want to know what lives next door – “What’s here with a little change,” as Life goes marching on. Central Park and the Death Valley were the same when Joe Grinnell Set the specimens aside so we could see what time would tell: The smallest palest Passer in the world now have rung the bell Of life still marching on. Feeding on the Land Iguana Darwin had the great idea A simple mechanism that made everything so clear If all creatures are related we’re obliged to hold them dear as Life goes marching on. Gaia, Gaia, biocentric, Gaia, Gaia, biocentric, Gaia, Gaia, biocentric, as Life goes marching on. Reply ABB September 14, 2022 Hilarious satire. The last line really clinches things. Reply The Society September 15, 2022 This is a good resource on the problems with the theory of evolution by the way: https://www.theepochtimes.com/3-things-about-evolution-you-probably-didnt-know_4425491.html?utm_source=partner&utm_campaign=classicalpoets Evan Reply Leave a Reply Cancel ReplyYour email address will not be published.CommentName* Email* Website Notify me of follow-up comments by email. Notify me of new posts by email. Δ This site uses Akismet to reduce spam. Learn how your comment data is processed.