Humor

  Dear Edgar, __We’re sorry our response has taken so much time, but it grieves and pains to tell you that you’ve missed our paradigm. __While past works were droll and erudite ---nay,...

. . The Rub   I’ve had a taste of wonder and I cannot give it back. I’ve seen each deep state blunder and the swamp’s heart dipped in black. I’ve witnessed this great country as it’s getting back...

. Rudolph the Red-Nosed Reindeer---A Sonnet Poor Rudolph was a reindeer with a nose resembling a bulb of bright red hue. The other reindeer laughed and said, “It glows like Santa’s after knocking back a...

. “Learn from yesterday, live for today, hope for tomorrow. The important thing is not to stop questioning.” ---Albert Einstein If I put forth a single vaccine questionAbout a jab that’s whipped up in a...

. . The Rape of Lady Liberty In Memoriam: November 3, 2020 by Patrick Henry Redivivus They did the awful deed within the dark--- Brute men with beastly hearts, as black as coal, And blinded minds, like...

based on a true story My wife’s in bed with lowered head and even lower mood. Her chin’s on her chest and she’s not impressed though at least she’s eating her food. Her smiles are...

. Stages of Arrested Development __The lads who once had wet their beds __Adventured off in brand-new Keds, Exploring every corner of creation. __Age twelve or so, they raced on sleds __Down icy streets and...

_ On Your Marx If humans ran a Human Race, __Karl Marx would not be in it. The human depth that he could trace __would leach out in a minute. For he is neither man nor beast __but half-life near demonic, A...

Poet Susan Jarvis Bryant challenges her fellow poets to adapt a favorite joke into a poem with meter and rhyme. Enjoy her examples and then post your own joke-turned-poem into the comments section...

2 November 2020 Two weeks and counting here I be In clutches of the CCP I don’t delight as I once did In birthday presents, cards, and quid, But my two darling angel-girls Served me with functionary...

  The turkey that we blithely ate Had little cause to celebrate The final Thursday in November. It's customary to dismember A hapless bird that's plucked and trussed To satisfy our boundless...

  Thanksgiving 1984 2020 Wear a mask until you eat and never touch your face. Muzzle up between each bite and when you’re saying grace. No more guests than four to eight at six full feet apart. To...

  Cricket The game of Cricket, I’ll relate, Goes back to fifteen fifty-eight, Upon a field in Guildford way, In Surrey, many miles away. The game was played by many more, Up to the English...

Mozart on His Kegelstatt Trio Quite recently I wrote a little trio While wasting time at skittles with some friends. We needed something for the clarinet, Something not dolorous, but not con brio— A...

_ Pope Urban II Sonnet-Speech, Clermont, 1095 Oh Noblemen, I’m charged by God to warn that Christendom is threatened by the Turk. Torched churches and our pilgrim dead we mourn, whilst in Jerusalem’s...

  On Marriage I married a girl named Sue And alas! She married me too!     As Then, So Now When years ago and many ages since My flaming ardor flared (now fondness thrives For you,...

  She was the one who approached me and spoke, Saying my lectures had swept her away. Maybe we could have occasional chats After class ended, with coffee or drinks? Cued and emboldened, I made an...

  Mary had a little lamb His fleece was white as snow. This little lamb, we’ll call him Stan, Starred at a livestock show. Stan followed her to cooking school Her class was on white...

  A Verse for the Morning After As thieves and pirates count our votes And set us at each other’s throats And fiddle while our cities burn, I wonder, will we ever...

Post your Election Day poem in the comments section below.    Quatrains They “battle for the soul of the nation” And have their voting registration As Democrats—it’s true, at...

The American Revolution: An Epic Poem Chapter I Chapter II by Andrew Benson Brown   Chapter III: The New-World Mercury The historical source material for the below installment is Paul Revere’s...

Let's Do It! The surgeon does it in a snip within a stitch of time. The comic does it with a quip, the actor with a line. Morticians do it clad in black with grave and stiff demeanor. The lawyer on the...

In British folklore, the Beast of Bodmin Moor is a phantom feral cat. Bodmin Moor (Cornwall, England) is a hub of horror, with regular sightings and reports of savagely slain livestock. I’ve sensed the...

Is this a werewolf’s trick, or witch’s treat? A devil’s joke? Humanity’s defeat? Who would have thought we’d live to see the day When people would freak out to see a face--- A friendly human...

  Nothing Ventured an office romance "What more do you want?" he inquired without guile. ---Can it really be true that my feelings don't show?--- She marveled within, and, suppressing a...

  Now when you get to sixty-five, your memory starts to slip, But when you get to seventy, you have to get a grip. It’s best if you can write things down to put your mind at ease, To stop you...

  Vocations Always there are things we should be doing; Others, though, are better left unfinished. Also, there are ends well worth pursuing; Likewise, goals that leave a wight...

All poetry by Bruce Dale Wise. Originally published by the SCP 9/26/18 Consumer Rights by Cal Wes Ubideer Accountability, transparency, and search control, consumer advocates are fighting Big-Tech's...

  “Hunter, you’ve disgraced the name of 'Biden.' Your laptop’s in the hands of some porn cop! I’ve told you, as a Biden you’ll be spied on--- Get thee behind me, spawn of dumb Corn...

  “Censorship is to art, as lynching is to justice.” —Henry Louis Gates, Jr. by Caud Sewer Bile Joe’s never spoken to his son about Burisma—No! The New York Post was not supposed to show...

Retired K-9 When I was young, you kept me in a cage. But as I got a little calmer, older, Sometimes you’d let me ride in the front seat Shotgun, with my paw upon your shoulder. It wasn’t just for...

What if I do compare you to a rose Or summer’s day or beauty like the night, Or drone of how I’d sit and drink a coke With you instead of viewing every sight This world can give?—the seven wonders...

  At midnight, Don was not asleep. And so, he rose to eat and tweet. He ate McD’s; he felt relaxed. He walked around, and then he spat. On Fox, he watched a Democrat who launched a partisan...

  No Signal, Please Stand By by Lu “Reed ABCs” Wei Perhaps the most intriguing thing about the past debate between vice-presidential candidates was its strange fate, that when Vice President...

  Eternal Apocalypse I’ve managed to escape a coming ice age; A mammoth hasn’t tossed me to my death. I’ve dodged the planet’s ozone-waning end-stage; Our green and pleasant land’s still...

  a parody of Tennyson's "The Eagle" Upon the bronze haired statue head Enringed in evening’s smoggy spread She beak-pecks on a littered bread. There, on the gritty concrete lies A pop of corn...

Reflections of an Aging Moon Great brassy stalks of varicolored horns Blow notes to keep the bees awake at noon. Immersed in gaudy zinnia’s stippled forms, They dance and flit, in homage to the...

  At the Supper Table of a Progressive They understood riots and death and what's more, "Adore them all really," and down to the core, So dropping my napkin to grant them the same, I upset their...

  Feeding Time Chickens feed on chicken feed. Birds on birdseed, yes-indeed! Cattle feed on cattle feed, Twitters feed on Twitter feed. People feed on many things, Avocados, onion rings, Water...

  There’s no age bar on titivating hair, Apart from putting rouge on wrinkled cheek. A Speaker has the right to looking fair, And prune her brunette hair once in a week. Pandemics come and go,...