Humor

. The Pietà or Mickey Mouse? A book I’ve read depicts a boy Who’s searching for creative joy. His mind can’t focus on a vision, So he’s weighed down by indecision: To carve the rock behind his...

. Belling the Cat The mice called a council to try to defeat A troublesome cat who would ruthlessly eat Any mouse in the house that she happened to meet. A young mouse spoke first. “Pay attention to...

. Aphorisms for a Foggy Morning No literary monuments exist without the word. A lord who lacks entitlements is patently absurd. A song that has no sound to give has never yet been heard. Two wings for every...

. The Magic Casket 'Twas in the local funeral home __The miracle occurred, As ticking clock hands kissed at noon __And restless spirits stirred… A gasp, a creak, a quake, a crash, __A spectral puff...

. Mosquitoes God designed the darn mosquito, But the reason’s nothing we know. Seems their less than epic purpose Is to bite our epidermis. . . The Left’s Vision for Future Transportation From much of...

. Gordon’s Soup One day old Arthur Vincent Knowling, Quit the couch to take up bowling, Grasped the fact at fifty-three, The time he’d wasted on TV. He’d been a hermit all these years And suddenly was...

. Ghost in This House "I don’t mind staying in, there’s another ghost here. He sits down in your chair, and he shines with your light, And he lays down his head on your pillow at night.“ —lyrics from...

. The Boy Who Cried Wolf Once there lived a shepherd boy who Despised his dull profession. His job was to alert the town When wolves would show aggression. One Saturday in late July, He thought it would be...

. Pick-up Truck Dude This dude in his old pick-up truck Sped recklessly, riding his luck. __He swerved ‘round the bend, __Lost control in the end, And got his truck stuck in the muck. . . Sleeping...

. Two Summer Villanelles . l. Lone Star Sear The burn and boil is grim for some. I’m red of neck and flushed of cheek. I’m roasting under summer’s thumb. Cicadas thrum and twang and strum Their shrill...

. Curious Couplets . Goose Lady When driving through a blizzard, Marge Espied a goose, not over large. Determinedly it marched along— One wing dragged as it sang its song And whistled wee wee as it went— A...

. Medieval Scam Letter Felicitations from the Holy Land, Where I, as sole survivor of a band Of mercenary soldiers stashed away Much booty; and concealèd it shall stay Until a boat’s procured to sail me...

. The Sky Within The rolling sea becomes a frothy lather When argent Sister Moon calls forth a tide And sooty billows on the skyline gather. A flash of lightning urges us inside Where we observe the phases of...

. The Tortoise and the Hare in limericks A tortoise and hare were a-talkin’. Said Hare: “Why, your slowness is shockin’! __If we ran a race, __You’d be a disgrace. I’d win, even if I were...

. The Number 53: To His Coy Transport Had we but world enough and time, My coy and tardy 53, This hesitancy were no crime And I’d be waiting patiently. When other buses came along I’d not obstruct or...

. Henry at Morning Time I’m lost in Greek or Latin, when You break into my life again. “Daddy, look! It’s morning time,” You say, as rays of sun sublime Bring color to the room. The leaves of...

. Don't Mess with Texas Gals On My Late Life Wife . Don't mess with my hot Texan. She's Texas born and bred. She does not fool with strangers. She'd rather see them dead. They said when she was born She had...

. The Number 44: The Cookery Class Now, this is a tale of a cookery class; It happened in Battersea early one March. The teacher was Jane who though barely thirteen Already sought fame as a culinary...

. The Adventures of Verb At six, I had a dictionary Where I would meet a man named Verb, Superb and quite extraordinary, In every definition’s blurb, Right at the finish, did while doing, For example:...

. Fifth Glyph This glyph, in British talk, occurs most oft--- most common, too, writ down within our books. Twixt ‘a’ and ‘z’ it’s fifth, not sat aloft but low and unassuming in its...

. Gnome A long-time fixture at our home Is Schnozz, our little garden gnome. This non-complaining happy chap Appears to have a handicap, And looks to me, I must confess, A poor neglected, grubby mess. His...

. Come September a pantoum Ohio State’s your home come September, Though we'll be lonely, stuck as empty nesters. Our home will be without its central member, When college life will beckon each...

. Butterfly Habit Ungainly butterfly, Misdirected flight. Fascinating random, Unpredictable delight. To and fro… up and down And backwards if you please, Bumbling aeronautics Independent of the...

. On Second Thought When words fail, __perhaps it’s not the words at all, __but hobbled minds that cannot call __a lucid image to avail ____the powers of description. When love fades, __it might not be true...

. A Poetic Heretic’s Poetry Tips a villanelle inspired by Dr. Salemi's essay "Poetry As The Philosophers Stone" Don’t listen to the howl of highbrow spiel From preachy creatures out to flatten...

. Ode to the Turnip Oh, turnip! You’re a vegetable maligned, suggestive of a drunk’s empurpled nose. Baked, or boiled, or steamed, on you I’ve dined, then revelled in a peaceful night’s repose. Your...

. The Shortfalls of Empirical Knowledge Sorry, Iowa. Each night is different from all previous And therefore not the same as those to come. The ways of Nature can be devious: They test experience and leave us...

. Why Children Like Nursery Rhymes A story to be told, a tale to tell Of things that do not matter much at all. Who cares about the farmer in the dell? Or Humpty-Dumpty falling off a wall? The pickled peppers...

. Salutations, Spring We sing your praises long before you’re due and after you’ve departed—all year long! You bring green grass and flowers into view— plus bugs, torrential rains, and winds so...

. A Few Special Letters . The mother goddess The m’s the mother goddess of the letters: Her shape exemplifies the female form. A bosom there for some, a bottom others; For warmth and comfort is...

. Growing Up . Starving Children in China If you don’t eat the food that’s on your plate ....I will, in turn, assert That you will be excused—no need to wait— ....For you won’t get dessert. . Crime...

. The King of Ice Cream in reference to recent Biden comments here. The current White House resident Is more than just the President. He’s King! The King of Ice Cream! A freezer-full of ice cream! A tragic...

. Parque España, Mexico City I walked until I couldn't walk without at least alighting on a city bench, the first that had a shaded seat, about ten yards from workers digging out a trench to place a pipe to...

. The Number 274: Timothy Pugh Now this is the story of Timothy Pugh Who woke up one morning in Regent's Park Zoo. He couldn’t recall what had happened before, Nor how he had boarded the 274. He couldn’t...

. The following is an excerpt of Don Quixote by Miguel Cervantes, encompassing most of Chapters 1 through 8, including Don Quixote getting his start, acquiring his squire Sancho Panza, and going on the...

. The Tragedy of the p and the q . Lovers in eternity The p and q were two eternal lovers Who faced each other in the alphabet. To all else lost, oblivious of others, The ideal Romeo and Juliet. But though...

. Avalon This little tale concerns a man, Who in an English village ran A thriving little corner shop, Supplying shakes and soda pop. This fellow did his best to try, His customers to satisfy, As in his shop,...

. The Dandelion Suburbia frowns upon her sunlit face: “Out, out thou upstart weed!” Poor Dandelion —like sisters Cinderella, Queen Anne’s lace— a beauty cast aside; no bed to lie in. Medicinal,...

. How to Write Contemporary Poetry a pantoum in free verse composition keep letters lower case. dump classical tradition then cite the marketplace. keep letters lower case make use of ampersands then cite the...

. Learnin’ Letters I wanna learn me letters Ma, I wanna learn ta read. If I can learn me letters Ma, We’ll ‘ave the things we need. An’ when I grows ta be a man, I’ll be a proper gent, Discussin’...